Why does a guy propose marriage and then postpone it? There will be no wedding. Signs that a man won't marry you. If you didn't follow the "Rules" during courtship

Many women dream of getting married. Some please men in every possible way so that their hearts finally thaw, others agree to live in civil marriage. They wash, feed and take care of their loved one every day. But the initiative can come not only from a woman, but also from a man. After a short romantic courtship, he invites his lady of his heart to marry him.

If a man proposes marriage, do not be afraid. After all, deep down in her soul the woman was waiting for just such words. You can be silent for a while, and then be sure to answer him. If you delay the pause for too long, a man may think that they want to reject him or that he is not satisfied with something or something else. In such a situation, he sincerely wants to share his life with the woman he has chosen. With the words: “Marry me,” he says that he wants to always be there, create a strong family, protect, care and love his woman. If, nevertheless, these words shocked the beautiful girl, then it is better to say that she needs to think about it. And there really is something to think about.

You can immediately give a positive answer. Then he will be sure that the feelings are mutual, and he did not make a mistake in his choice. An excellent option for such a surprise would be a specially created romantic atmosphere. Then all attention is focused only on the girl, and she will feel even more loved and desired.

Very nice option a man’s proposal may result in a non-standard answer. For example, if a girl is confused and simply cannot say anything out of happiness, you can write the word “Yes” on his hand using your fingertips. Or make a “+” sign from two Twix sticks.

According to psychologists, at the moment when a guy proposes marriage to a girl, he experiences very strong excitement, the level of adrenaline in his blood doubles. This is due to the novelty of the current situation and the incredible feeling of fear of hearing a negative answer.

In general, it all depends on the girl’s attitude towards the guy. If she perceives him as good friend, then it is better to refuse marriage. In order for a woman to agree, she must see in a man good father for your children, a great husband, a loyal friend and a wonderful lover. If at least one of the listed links is missing, then it is advisable not to marry this guy, since not everyone in him will be happy.

In general, the more original the method of recognition, the greater the likelihood of obtaining the girl’s consent to marriage. Pleasant surprises often help to win the heart of a beauty.

A girl can get confused when a guy starts to propose overly emotionally or actively gesticulates without looking his partner in the eye. Sometimes this may mean that he himself is not sure of his choice.

A girl's eyes can convey a lot. If after such a proposal they sparkled and even shed a little tears, everything is clear - she is incredibly happy and agrees. In the absence of such signs, we can say with confidence that there is no love here. And most likely she will refuse.

Often a woman, having seen more than once how many families suffer while living in marriage, refuses. Psychologists call this a negative experience. If there is a bad idea about the family, then the woman is afraid to enter into a legal relationship, because she believes that the same thing will happen to her. The man’s task is to convince her otherwise.

In any case, sooner or later this happens - a man proposes to a woman to marry him. The main thing is that this man is loved and loving person, could stand up for his family. Then there will be no doubt about him.

What almost all women strive for and what many men are terrified of. We won’t talk about women’s motivation, you already know everything. But what can make a man get married is to say, first of all, to himself: “I’ll get married!” – this might be interesting.

By tradition, let’s dot the “e” right away. We do not consider so-called “missing marriages”. I can’t help but call such a marriage a balanced male decision. Alas, as experience shows, “they lived happily ever after” does not work in this case. And what kind of happiness can we talk about when a man, sniffling through his nose, covered with red spots and looking away to the side, squeezes out, gritting his teeth: “Well, since you don’t want an abortion... Let’s sign...”?

Please note, not “marry me”, not “be my wife”, not “let’s get married”, but “let’s sign”! A man does not marry, but signs. What a frivolous word. I don’t know about anyone, but my first association is preference! The men and I got together, signed a bottle for cognac and ran away. So it is here. They signed their names and ran away after some time. All. I don't want to talk about this anymore.

Dear ladies, believe me: delaying and forcing a man to marry is a thankless task. Remember in school they taught: “Action equals reaction”? Every man, when he hears the word “wedding,” immediately remembers another word – “freedom.” Agree, the second sounds much more romantic! I'm getting married... But what about friends? Beer? Saunas? Girls? Night clubs? To go fishing - ask for time off, to go to football - as an exception, to play on the computer - and even then ask permission! 90% of the phone book will have to be cleaned... Oh, God forbid, a scam? That's a lot of money and nerves!

Bottom line: a man believes that he will always have time to get married.

A man has matured - a man marries

The main thesis of my article is that a man must be ripe for marriage. The period of maturation is individual for all men. And it is a mystery even to ourselves. It lasts until the man understands that that’s it! The very freedom that he valued so much is not needed even by him.

My friends are a little fed up, I can’t get enough beer, I just want to wash myself in the sauna, and the girls tire me out with the monotony of desires and poses. And the old truth comes to mind: it is better to be needed than to be free! And behind it the thought comes knocking - I’ll get married! I want to live with this woman, I’m ready to watch her constantly nearby, endure her bad character and her mother, who matches her character, raise children and someday die with my chosen one on the same day.

Everything else is nothing more than beautiful fairy tales invented by women for self-affirmation. He married me for love! He married because I'm smart and beautiful! He got married because of my rich inner world! Yes, that's all true. But! Over time, love and beauty, if not completely erased, then noticeably fade, but there are plenty of smart people with a rich inner world... even among men. Therefore, when a man gets married (of course, we are talking about a smart man), he always “looks at the root,” that is, into the foggy future, trying to discern himself and his future wife there after 20, 30, 50 years. Look at it and tell yourself again – yes, this suits me!

I was a fool. No, my marriage cannot be called early or even more hasty. But then I didn’t think about anything like that. Just after six years life together The question arose: either we get married or we separate. Moreover, none of us specifically raised this issue. It just happened. Life is Beautiful and amazing. Just yesterday everything was quiet and calm, like a swamp in the forest. And today is the first time! Break! And either jump or fall. And you, like that Hamlet, wander from corner to corner and mutter: “To be or not to be?”

To somehow put my thoughts in order and take my mind off emotions, I sat down and wrote everything down on paper. Classic pros and cons. As a result, he proposed to his wife. Even on the same paper I wrote something like marriage contract. I don’t think that with this writing I convinced my future wife of anything, but three months later she agreed. Thirteen years have passed and the flight is normal. Lucky.

Wait - and the man will get married!

So here it is, dear women If you want to get married, be patient. Who knows, maybe your man will “ripe” tomorrow or in a week? Well, in a couple of years - for sure! And then one fine day your man will decide to get married and say: “Darling, be my wife!”

If you get tired of waiting, look for a more “mature” man. But I beg you: do not make the common mistake of all women - do not put pressure on us. Believe me, this will not make anyone feel better. Under pressure, a man will not marry or will take this step thoughtlessly - it’s worse for you.

Like the classic: “Never ask for anything! Never and nothing, and especially among those who are stronger than you. They will offer and give everything themselves.” Very true. This also applies to us men. Especially single ones. A man gets married, but it will be like in the joke:

“When you get married, son, you’ll find out.”

- Is it true?

- True... but it will be too late...

In our time legal marriage only one type of relationship between a man and a woman. A couple can choose to register the union officially, live, or just meet. It’s good when the type and form of the relationship suits both partners. But what if a woman is ready for marriage, but a man is not, or vice versa?

Why do men get married?

The relationship between lovers involves a period of premarital courtship, which turns into the creation of a family union. Sometimes this period drags on too long, people begin to live together in a civil marriage, but do not get married.

A woman herself can propose to a man, couples come to a joint decision to get married, talking about the future, but the preferred and most desirable option is still when a man proposes to his beloved. Why sometimes a man doesn’t get married and is in no hurry?

Marriage is the most acceptable and socially approved form of family relations.

The right to marriage and founding a family is regulated by law. There are a number of legal rights and obligations of spouses and legal prohibitions and restrictions on marriage. However, adults are free to choose a partner and are free to both marry and divorce.

The most common reasons pushing a man to get married:

Love. When a couple's relationship is saturated mutual love, trust, understanding and respect, a man has a desire to consolidate, preserve and legitimize them. When he is sure that he has found what he was looking for, a man is ready to get married.
Need. In life young man there comes a time when he is no longer satisfied with short-term relationships, and the need for creating a family, coziness, comfort, and stability appears. A man wants to see next to him not just a girl, but a wife who will always be there, share his life with him, give birth to children, be a housewife, lover, friend. Freedom and independence begin to be perceived as loneliness; a desire to belong and be needed arises.
Parental instructions. Parents can influence a man's desire to find a wife and the decision to marry a particular girl. Good and wise advice loving parents will be beneficial and help you make a choice; an unkind attitude and slander against a girl can destroy the union of two lovers.
Pregnancy. Most people become sexually active before marriage. Despite big choice means to prevent unwanted pregnancy, the imminent birth of a baby common reason marriage.
By calculation. Any marriage is beneficial to both partners to one degree or another, but in marriages of convenience, personal gain is the only reason.

A man gets married out of psychological calculation, having decided for himself that a woman is suitable for him as a life partner. The calculation may be based on the desire to have a wife who will arrange the home, clean, wash, cook, and so on. There are gigolo men who view a rich wife as a way to get rich. There are many problems that a successful marriage can solve, so arranged marriages also occur.

Signs that a man is ready to get married

A man does not always marry of his own free will; there are cases when this necessity is dictated by conscience or is the result of... Sometimes a man does not want to get married and is not ready for marriage, but is forced into it.

A young man is ready to get married if:

He is independent. We are talking about material and moral independence. When a man gains financial well-being, a secure job, and understands that he can provide not only for himself, but also for his family, he feels confident and ready to take on the responsibility of supporting his family.
He wants a family. When a man comes to realize the need to have a family, wife and children, but strives to satisfy this need. This realization can come to a man at any age, but more often it occurs between the ages of 20 and 30.
He's ready for fatherhood. When a man shows interest in children and everything connected with them, loves to play and babysit other people's babies, most likely he wants to have his own children.
He is practically a husband: he takes relationships seriously; values ​​the girl, says and proves that she is special to him; plans a future together; spends most of his time with his beloved; introduces her to parents, relatives, friends; supports morally and financially; assumes problem-solving responsibilities; for relationships.

When a man is not ready to marry

When a man is ready to get married, he does not delay making such a decision. Most likely, a man does not marry because he is not mentally ready or doubts his choice.

Other possible reasons reluctance to get married:

Fear of losing freedom. This fear hides the negative when it is perceived as a bond that oppresses personality and independence. This opinion is held by men who are not ready to work on relationships, who are unsure of themselves, and immature individuals.
Fear of responsibility. A man understands that the right to be a husband implies responsibilities and responsibility for the family. He either realizes that he is incapable of becoming a husband, or does not want to take on such responsibility.
Reluctance to change anything. If a man is completely satisfied with the relationship and he is sure that there is nowhere to develop it further, he does not feel the need to formalize it. Most likely, the man initially did not set a goal to find a wife, but simply wanted to start a relationship. He doesn’t understand why change anything when everything is fine as it is.
Experience. Negative experience and bad marriage in the past gives rise to doubts and fears that prevent one from believing in the possibility.
Environment. When others, parents and friends are against the man’s bride, he even listens to their words against his own will, decides to wait and check the girl before asking her to marry.
Fear of the wedding. Sometimes men are held back by fear of the marriage process itself, wedding ceremony, the need to publicly express your feelings.
Lack of love for a woman. There are rarely men who are ready to voluntarily tie the knot with an unloved woman (the exception is marriages of convenience).

Question answer

Every girl who has been dating or living with a guy in a civil marriage for a long time, sooner or later asks the question: “Will the man marry me?”

To answer this question, you need to carefully observe your chosen one, note the signs that he is or is not ready for marriage and draw conclusions.

Knowing the possible reasons for marriage, you can push a man to propose. But you need to understand the limits of what is reasonable and not resort to manipulation or blackmail.

If you behave like a caring wife and give your man the opportunity to imagine what will happen when he gets married, you can help him make his choice. Having felt the positive aspects of a family union, a man will want to get married. The main thing is not to overdo it, demonstrating your talents and abilities, so that the man does not have the question: “If she already behaves like a wife, why get married?”

Getting your parents and relatives to like you is another opportunity to push a man towards marriage.

But the best answer to the question of how to get married is to love a man, to be for him the woman with whom he wants to spend the rest of his life.

No, no, this is not the right address! How to propose marriage to a man or guy...I’ve already started to have a nervous itch. I can't imagine a girl proposing to a guy. Or that a woman proposes to a man. A woman can propose to a man in one and only case, namely: when she is absolutely sure that he himself is not talking to her about marriage only because he is afraid to hear a categorical “No” from her.

Cute girl! Yes, yes, you! Who decided to propose to her beloved man. Here and now. Finally and without unnecessary omissions. Has it ever occurred to you that this man (who, as I understand it, is much older than you) has not yet waved to you for one reason? Namely, because you have never even made a peep about how desperately you want him to propose to you? When a man really intends to marry a girl who is much younger than him, he does not think twice about it. And the young lady receives an offer of his hand, and at the same time his heart, from this man very, very quickly.

The same situation is with a woman. Since a man does not propose to her, it means that he has absolutely no intention of legitimizing his relationship with her - at least at this stage of his life. So simple. How else? Or does anyone seriously believe that excessive shyness prevents a man from proposing marriage?

Dear loving girls-women-comrades - ladies! Instead of puzzling yourself with the question of how to propose to your beloved man, it is better to think about something else in your spare time. Namely: how to provoke this man to propose to you himself? I repeat. If a man doesn’t talk to you about marriage, it means one of three things: either he’s not sure that you love him, or he’s not thinking about it yet. family life, or he is not going to marry you at all. So what should I do? In any case, don’t propose marriage to him yourself!

A man, as a rule, always needs a little push, and your declaration (or half-confession) of love can be such a push. “I’m glad that you and I are together”, “I wouldn’t want us to ever break up”... Say such neutral phrases as if by the way. Rest assured: the man will hear them very well, and will understand very well what exactly you are trying to tell him. Well, then just watch his reaction. Perhaps a man will propose marriage to you instantly (as it happened to me). He may need some time to become more clear about his feelings for you. But it is possible - and you need to prepare yourself for this - he will soon end your relationship. The most important thing here is to remain frank with yourself, and clearly determine in advance for yourself how many months or years of your life you are willing to waste waiting.

Be that as it may, a woman cannot ask a man to marry her; this is not accepted. Moreover, it is not accepted, first of all, in the world of men themselves. A man proposes marriage! And the woman (girl) accepts him (or does not accept him) - that’s how she decides to dispose of her Destiny.

Do you disagree with what I'm saying? Are you still patiently waiting for an answer to the question of how best you can propose to your man? Are you, more than ever, confident that a woman may well propose marriage - and a man may well decide whether to give this woman the honor of accepting her proposal? Well, this is a position that is completely alien to me (I admit!), which, nevertheless, “has absolutely the right to exist” (that’s what they usually say, it seems?) But what, exactly, is the difficulty? "I love you very much. Would you like to become my husband? That's all. The offer has been made. And whether you get your man’s hand and heart in return - that’s whatever he wants.

Well, for that girl who is not going to propose to her boyfriend to marry her, and also for that woman who will never make the same proposal to her man, I will still repeat myself. As soon as a man decides to propose to you, he will do it. Even if he, a man, lives on the other side of the planet. Even if he doesn't know a word of your language. The same applies to the guy. Just allow yourself the luxury of being proud - and wait for this moment.