Daily life of Pakistani families. Marry a Pakistani What are Pakistani men

Although Pakistan is a young nation, it has an ancient history. Very different and distinctive Islamic, Buddhist and Hindu traditions, elements of cultural and social organization, the origins of which are more than five thousand years old, have mixed together here. For the most part, Pakistanis profess Islam, which plays a huge role in the social and political life of the country. In fact, Muslim traditions permeate the entire life of a Pakistani from his birth to death, which is clearly reflected in the habits and behavior of people. Even the laws of the state are built on the basis of Sharia, and the Koran is the fundamental point of all social relations. The educational system is based on the dominance of Islamic values, where theology is the main discipline along with academic subjects and languages. There are many specialized schools in cities and large settlements, but admission to them is possible only after graduating from high school (primary education is not compulsory, although the level of education is highly valued in the local society). However, the "Pakistani version" of Islam is somewhat more tolerant of manifestations of dissent, and secular traditions are also very strong in the life of the country itself.

Close to Hindi, Urdu is the official language of Pakistan (writing based on Arabic script), but Hindi, Punjabi, Balochi, Pashto, Pact, Farsi and other oriental languages are also widely used in everyday life. English is understood by more than 20% of the population of cities, primarily by the educated segments of society; in the provinces it is almost never used, however, all signs and road signs are often duplicated in English. English is also used in trade, tourism, business and government correspondence.

Pakistanis are a very religious people. Praying people can be seen everywhere, some drivers even stop right on the route, get out of the car and pray together with passengers (this even applies to trains). The requirements of the canons of Islam are strictly observed, starting with the schedule of prayers or the obligatory deduction of specialized taxes for every Muslim, and ending with the usual hospitality for this country. The ability to meet and receive a guest, even if one's own house does not shine with prosperity, is valued here both as an art and as an important social factor. At the same time, unlike many of their neighbors in the region, Pakistanis are friendly to all foreigners without exception, and the traditional politicization of the local society is not at all traced here. Pakistanis are very good-natured to those who do not violate their customs and traditions, they are quite indulgent to other people's mistakes, so here it is enough just to observe all decorum in case of an invitation. It is not recommended to refuse an invitation or offer to contribute (food or money) to the upcoming banquet - it is easier to offer small gifts to the owners of the house - flowers, sweets, tobacco or souvenirs (by no means alcohol!).

Like other peoples of Asia, Pakistanis have a complex code of conduct, dominated by the concepts of social status, the reputation of the family (or clan) and the level of wealth. Moreover, this applies not only to the Muslims of the country, but in most cases it has taken root among both Hindus and Christians. From the culture of Hinduism, instead, a rather strict division into classes came (a kind of relic of the caste system), within which there is a rather thin and incomprehensible social hierarchy to a foreigner. The tribal system in Balochistan and Punjab is very strong and is a powerful political factor in the life of the whole country, and temporary or permanent tribal associations replace political parties here (often members of the same party or faction are members of the same clan or tribe, although this is not officially emphasized).

Of the tough local "taboos", one should strictly take into account the rules traditional for many countries of the Islamic world: one should not pass in front of a praying person, one should not point the soles of the feet at other people (even when visiting a house or a mosque, when you need to take off your shoes, you should fold your shoes with the sole to the sole and put in a specially designated place), you should not accept or serve anything with your left hand (it is used for personal hygiene) and especially - take food with it, washing your hands before and after eating is mandatory, you can not touch a person’s head (especially a child, yes and just touching other people is not recommended), you can not enter the female half of the house, and so on. It is customary to say hello in a completely European way, but again - only with the right hand (hugs and kisses are quite acceptable between well-known people, you can often meet men walking down the street holding hands - this is quite acceptable between friends). Special attention should be paid to gestures - like many residents of the Middle East and Arab countries, Pakistanis use a complex system of gestures in communication, while many of our everyday movements may well turn out to be offensive according to local concepts.

An important place in local etiquette is respect for elders. The oldest of the men is consulted on every serious matter affecting family interests, and his opinion is taken into account on a par with such respected people as a mullah or a qadi. Older people often live with their children and enjoy unquestioned authority, both men and women. All important events in the life of the family are celebrated by the whole family, often with all relatives and friends, and it is the elders who determine the correspondence of festive etiquette to traditions, which is very important. Marriages are usually arranged by kinship type or within the same community (clan). Children are considered gifts of Allah, and therefore the attitude towards them is the most reverent (however, sons are obviously pampered more than daughters, since the latter will require a large dowry when they get married, which makes parents go into debt for a long time).

The position of women in local society is rather peculiar. On the one hand, Pakistan is one of the most "Europeanized" countries of the Islamic world, where women have wide access both to public life and education, and to politics (suffice it to say that this is the only state in the Muslim world where a woman even led the country for a long time ). However, within the family or community, the status of a woman is determined by the traditions and values of Islam, which are unusually strong in this aspect. In many southern regions, where Hindu influence is strong, the situation of women is not much different from the countries of Southeast Asia, while at the same time, in the mountainous regions of the northern and northwestern provinces, the norms are noticeably stricter.

The veil here is a relatively rare item of women's wardrobe. A large coverlet is called "veil" and is used to visit mosques and other places of worship, although in the form of colorful "dupatta" and "chaddar" shawls, its variants are used everywhere (the decoration of such cloaks is a separate branch of local arts and crafts). Both men and women wear "shalwar-kameez" - a national dress, which is loose trousers ("shalwar") gathered at the ankles and waist in combination with a long shirt ("kameez"), however, women's clothing is more colorful and must be complemented by all the same handkerchiefs or a long scarf. Moreover, in each of the Pakistani provinces, the "shalwar kameez" has its own characteristics: in the northwest, they often wear a "tailcoat" (a long fitted dress and a wide skirt-pants), in Balochistan, the "shalwar" is noticeably longer and very wide (here they are called " gharara"), in Sindh instead of "shalwar" a wide skirt is used, and the shirt has a short sleeve. In Punjab, instead of "shalwar", women usually wear a loose "lungi" cape, similar to a sarong, and men wear a "dhoti" skirt, a loose jacket and a "pugri" turban. On festive occasions, women wear multi-colored saris, "gharar" (a looser analogue of "shalwar"), and men complement their clothes with an embroidered waistcoat and turban, or wear European-style clothes. Women pay special attention to jewelry, first of all, "churiya" bracelets (for unmarried girls they are made of plastic and glass, for married girls they are gold, and their quantity, quality and shape indicate the degree of solvency of their owner), rings and pendants "nat", as well as massive "jumka" earrings. Khussa - leather shoes with a turned up toe are considered traditional shoes.

In most cases, closed rather informal clothing is considered acceptable for a tourist, down to jeans and a long-sleeved shirt or sweater. Women are advised to avoid wearing short skirts and dresses with short sleeves. When visiting places of worship, the entire body, except for the feet and ankles, must be closed, women are required to wear a headscarf.

As in many other countries in the region, instead of toilet paper, a local equivalent of a bidet or just a jug of water is used. All natural needs are sent by local men while sitting, and often any more or less closed place is used for these purposes: city ditches, sidewalks, wastelands, roadsides, etc. (a centralized sewerage system is only in large cities, and even then not everywhere). Swimming is accepted only in running water, so there are practically no baths anywhere.

Smoking is banned in most public places, so it's common to politely ask permission before smoking in front of other people. At the same time, the Pakistanis themselves smoke quite a lot, but they try to do it out of sight.

One of the main disadvantages of belonging to such a homogeneous nation as ours is that it is extremely rare to hear an alternative point of view on history, religion, culture and society as a whole. Those who try to come up with an opinion that differs in any way from the generally accepted one are immediately branded as foreign agents, heretics, or worse, traitors.

I have compiled a list of ten things not to say to the average Pakistani:

1. America and Israel cannot be blamed for all the troubles of the Islamic world in general and Pakistan in particular. Born in a country that, literally until the early 1990s, was in the warmest friendly relations with the Americans, our youth shows an amazing ability to blame all the problems of the nation precisely on American foreign policy. Right-wing politicians do nothing but compose optimistic fables about the fact that we are a wonderful, peaceful people who are being pushed into the abyss by Zionists and infidels (infidels).

2. We live in an excellent country where seemingly educated people like Aamir Liaquat (a famous Pakistani politician and TV presenter - note InoSMI) first they say in a sugary voice that Islam is the most peaceful religion in the world, and then they make speeches full of hatred for Ahmadis (an Islamic sect, in Pakistan is being persecuted - note InoSMI). If you really want Islam to be respected, abolish archaic and discriminatory laws like punishment for blasphemy and the Hudood Decree . InoSMI). Scientists like Ghamidi (Javed Ahmad Ghamidi; Pakistani theologian - approx. InoSMI) have proved many times that the concept of "blasphemy" has no place in true Islamic jurisprudence (Gamidi himself, of course, has long been hiding in Malaysia, fearing for his life - an excellent example of how we treat those who have an opinion that differs from the generally accepted one).

3. In the bastion of Islam created by our mullahs, the rights of various minorities are constantly violated. At the same time, for some reason, we all firmly believe that Pakistan treats its minorities nobly. Just give a hint about the troubles that minorities face, ranging from infringement of their rights in the constitution to textbooks, and you will immediately become an enemy of Pakistan.

4. Women can date and marry anyone they like, and this also applies to your relatives (the latter will especially enrage your interlocutor). For some reason, a 20-year-old boy going on a date does not believe that his sister has the right to do the same. This logic is followed by older members of the family, in whose patriarchal consciousness the murder of their own daughter will bring the family less shame than if the same daughter went on a date or married of her own free will.

5. The army is to the same extent, if not more, guilty of the troubles of the country as the politicians. While there has been a slight change in the Pakistani mentality lately, and the military is finally getting its fair share of criticism, in the eyes of the average Pakistani, the army is still the epitome of national pride and all.

6. In the list of vital things, honor clearly ranks below food. We are a nation so obsessed with national pride that we forget the simple fact that some countries that are forced to seek foreign aid should not speak too loudly, even if they have nuclear weapons and Zaid Hamid (Pakistani political scientist who said, that the 2008 Mumbai attacks were staged by India itself with the support of the CIA and Mossad to destabilize the situation in Pakistan - note InoSMI).

7. You can hate Zardari personally as much as you like (Asif Ali Zardari; the current president of Pakistan, accused of large-scale corruption - note InoSMI), but we are a nation corrupt to the core. Living in our ideal world, which was created by Ansar Abbasi (Ansar Abbasi; a well-known Pakistani journalist engaged in high-profile political investigations - note InoSMI) and Shahid Masood (Shahid Masood; well-known Pakistani TV presenter and political scientist - note InoSMI), we transfer all our shortcomings to a single person and his party, but refuse to face cruel reality. We were mired in corruption long before Zardari came, and we won't be rid of it long after he's gone.

8. Our culture and traditions have much more in common with India, especially its northern regions, than with the puritanical trend of Islam, which has been actively implanted in our country over the past three decades. For some strange reason, people are much more comfortable telling themselves that their ancestors were Arabs than admitting that their great-grandfathers never left the subcontinent and abandoned one of the local beliefs in favor of Islam.

9. Every person or organization that speaks about pluralism, regional peace, women's rights, and a secular state is not sponsored by the United States or has some hidden agenda. People like Marvi Sirmed (Pakistani journalist and human rights activist - note InoSMI) or Dr. Hoodboy (Pervez Hoodbhoy; Pakistani nuclear physicist, environmentalist and social activist - note InoSMI), despite all their intellectual superiority and rational arguments, are attacked by the defenders of national pride, who constantly stigmatize them as spies and foreign agents.

10. Theocracy is nothing more than the tyrannical power of the clergy, but the only acceptable form of government for a modern state is democracy, the supremacy of the constitution and the division of powers between the various branches of power. This, again, infuriates the Napoleon Gul (Hameed Napoleon Gul; Pakistan Army General - note InoSMI) and Ali Azmatov (Ali Azmat; the leader of the Pakistani rock band Junoon, who has recently adhered to conservative views - note InoSMI) who sleep and see how they will rid the world of the evils of democracy and establish an international caliphate.

P.S. Do you think I'm kidding? Wait, now the commentators will catch up ...

The materials of InoSMI contain only assessments of foreign media and do not reflect the position of the editors of InoSMI.

In the photo, Parvin hails from the Federally Administered Tribal Areas (FATA) region. She says that she wants to change the image of women from this region, and that nothing is impossible for a woman if she sets a goal for herself. While Pakistan is still in turmoil and many areas are dominated by conservative social life, some of the country's wealthier residents work in the fashion industry and lead very different lifestyles. Photographs of men and women taking part in all kinds of activities and professions - from Pilates instructors to a textile retail entrepreneur, to a member of a rock band - offer a different perspective on Pakistan, which is often known only from military conflicts from the news.

1. Rock climber Nazia Parvin descends from a cliff during training, Islamabad, February 15, 2014.

2. Rock climber Nazia Parveen (right) jokes with her coach Imran Junaydi during her training session, Islamabad February 15, 2014. Parveen hails from the FATA region. She wants to change opinions about women from this region, and believes that nothing is impossible for a woman if she has a goal.

3. Ansa Hasan, marketing manager for Porsche Pakistan, gestures as she prepares for an upcoming event at the Porsche show in Lahore February 21, 2014.

4. Ansa Hasan, marketing manager for Porsche Pakistan, plays with a parrot at her home in Lahore February 21, 2014.

5. Interior designer Zahra Afridi uses a circular saw to make a stone guitar sculpture outside the Classic Rock Coffee Cafe in Islamabad on March 8, 2014. Afridi runs his own interior design company. Cafe "Classic Rock Coffee" in Islamabad is her latest project.

6. Interior designer Zahra Afridi (right) during kickboxing training at her home in Islamabad February 10, 2014. Afridi runs her own interior design company.

Interior designer Zahra Afridi (left) talks to a carpenter at a workshop on the outskirts of Islamabad February 10, 2014.

8. Alina Raza reads a book in her bedroom, Lahore, May 29, 2014. Raza runs a company that retails textiles under the So Kamal brand. The company is owned by her mother Erum Ahmed.

9. Erum Ahmed, Chief Executive Officer (CEO) of So Kamal textile company, talks with workers during a factory visit in Faisalabad, Feb. 25, 2014. Ahmed started producing textiles under her brand three years ago. She encourages the women who work for her company, located in the conservative city of Faisalabad.

10. Sarah (left) and her brother, artist Usman Ahmed (2nd from right), smoke a hookah while meeting with friends at their home in Islamabad on May 8, 2014.

11. Pilates instructor Zainab Abbas (right) smokes a cigarette after lunch with a friend at a cafe in Lahore February 19, 2014. Abbas opened the Route2Pilates fitness studio in Lahore after training in Bangkok, Thailand. She provides rehabilitation training for people with joint problems, as well as specialized training for pregnant women.

12. Sana Mir is the captain of the Pakistani women's cricket team at a training session in preparation for the international cricket World Twenty20 competition, Muridke, February 22, 2014. Sana enrolled in engineering at a national university, but left to devote herself to her passion for cricket.

13. Education worker and model Fatima (right) dials a number on her mobile, next to her with a glass of water, a domestic worker originally from the Philippines, Fatima's house in Lahore, May 28, 2014. Fatima is the CEO of PDLC Beaconhouse, and her stepmother is founder of the Beaconhouse school system (a network of schools).

14. Fatima walks past the pool in the gym at her home, at the end of the working day, Lahore, May 28, 2014. Fatima is the CEO of PDLC Beaconhouse.

All countries /Pakistan/ Customs and traditions in Pakistan. The nature of the Pakistanis

Customs and Traditions in Pakistan. The nature of the Pakistanis

Pakistan boasts a rich cultural heritage. In this country, ancient customs and traditions are intertwined between different peoples, and since Pakistan is a mountainous country, these peoples have not been in contact with each other for centuries. However, Pakistanis as an ethnic group can be given certain characteristics.

First of all, it is worth mentioning that once, Pakistan was a Muslim part. But by no means can it be said that Pakistanis are Indians. This is a completely different people, with their own language, a different mentality and other mores. Pakistan certainly deserves special attention.

There are many rumors about the wild customs and mentality of the Pakistanis. The country constantly appears in the news chronicles, because of the violence against each other. Who are the Pakistanis, and are they really so cruel - let's figure it out.

Pakistani mentality

Pakistanis are very difficult to describe in one word. As true Sunni Muslims, the whole life of the population is permeated with Islam, hence the peculiar mentality.

Sometimes one gets the impression that all Pakistanis, as if from another century, so carefully they keep their way of life and their traditions, especially when it comes to their women. The paradox itself is that as soon as a Pakistani leaves his homeland, only memories remain of a strictly and scrupulously religious Muslim. And in view of the fact that it is difficult to live in Pakistan - there is no money, no work, and many men leave to work in other countries (mainly in Arab countries -,, and so on). And there - as if Allah does not see - they are given entertainment, like the most ordinary Europeans - they drink alcohol, start novels, in general, they do not lead the most pious lifestyle. But, returning to their homeland, everything changes again, and the Pakistanis are again diligent Muslims. The phenomenon, in fact, is practically universal, and it is difficult to explain.

The culture and traditions of Pakistan have much more in common with India, especially with its northern regions, than with the puritanical current of Islam, which has been actively planted in Pakistan for the past three decades. For some strange reason, people are much more comfortable telling themselves that their ancestors were Arabs than admitting that their great-grandfathers never left the subcontinent and abandoned one of the local beliefs in favor of Islam.

The military situation of the country, of course, also influenced the mentality of the Pakistanis. Pakistan is constantly in martial law status: either conflicts and the war for independence with India, then some kind of graters with, then a war with the irrepressible Taliban - in general, to this day, terrorist attacks occur in the country from time to time. Despite its rich cultural heritage, Pakistan is considered an unsafe country to travel to.

Many Pakistanis are sure that not a single terrorist attack in their country can happen without the participation of America. , to put it mildly, the local population does not like it. They do not like the Indians, since many Pakistanis also died in the war for independence - until now, there are conflicts between the two countries over disputed territories in the Himalayas. As befits all Muslims, Pakistanis hate and blame him for all the troubles of the Islamic world in general and Pakistan in particular. It must be said that the hostility towards these countries is partly fueled by politicians in Pakistan. Right-wing politicians do nothing but make up optimistic fables about the fact that Pakistanis are a wonderful, peaceful people who are being pushed into the abyss by Zionists and infidels (infidels). Every now and then they sleep and see how they will rid the world of the evils of democracy and establish an international caliphate.

The army is as much, if not more, to blame for the troubles of the country as the politicians. Although the military has finally begun to receive its portion of well-deserved criticism recently, in the eyes of the ordinary Pakistani, the army still undividedly personifies national pride and everything else.

The Pakistani mentality is incredibly controversial, like the whole nation. Pakistanis first say in a sugary voice that Islam is the most peaceful religion in the world, and then they make speeches full of hatred for the Ahmadis, an Islamic sect that is being persecuted in Pakistan. In the "peaceful religion of the Pakistanis", there are still archaic and discriminatory laws, such as punishment for blasphemy and the Hudud decree (cruel punishments for, in particular, adultery, under which many victims of rape fell). In the bastion of Islam, created by the Pakistani mullahs, the rights of various minorities are constantly violated. At the same time, the majority of Pakistanis firmly believe that Pakistan treats its minorities with nobility. And you should not even try to convince the locals of the opposite - you will immediately become an enemy of Pakistan.

The attitude towards women in Pakistan is also, paradoxically, outrageously. Families protect their daughters like a real diamond, keep their wisdom and do not allow anything extra for their daughter. They themselves choose her future husband - a suitable, in their opinion, party. “Not bad at all,” you might think. What if the daughter disobeys? She is about to be punished. Reprisal from those people who loved her and protected her all her life. Senior members of the family, in the patriarchal mind of which the murder of their own daughter will bring the family less shame than if the same daughter went on a date or got married of her own free will, is quite a common, one might say, everyday occurrence in Pakistan.

Every person or organization that speaks of pluralism, regional peace, women's rights and a secular state, despite their intellectual superiority and rational arguments, is attacked by defenders of national pride who constantly stigmatize them as spies and foreign agents. People who decide to speak out openly about the country's wrong policies and perhaps wrong values are abused by the Pakistanis and soon leave the country forever (if they can before the religious fanatics kill them).

Pakistani character

The national character trait of the Pakistanis is that they all live one day. Here they don’t save money all their lives, they don’t dream of a pension, as in Europe, and they don’t think about long-term relationships either. Pakistanis, in most cases, do not know how to make friends. Perhaps this is due to the fact that surviving in the country (namely, surviving - not living) is quite difficult, therefore, they just have to grab something, deceive. Pakistanis "fool" even each other, moreover, with excellent skill, and if you are already a foreigner, then you are not lucky at all, most likely, 3 skins will be torn off from you. A true Pakistani will never miss his advantage. But, for the sake of decency, it is worth noting that there are quite decent and adequate people.

With medicine in Pakistan, everything is also not easy, there are not enough good specialists, the country has a high mortality rate. And what can we say about good doctors, when not pharmacists work in pharmacies in Pakistan, but random people who have enough money to open this business. There is no mention of licenses at all. You just come and say that you are in pain. The pharmacist gives you the medicine of his choice, no matter if it does not help you. If so, please come again.

People in Pakistan love to play cricket. This hobby has remained since the days of the British Empire. Cricket is the most popular sport in the country. Pakistan participates in international cricket competitions. The national cricket team is one of the strongest teams in the world. The country even has a national cricket committee that manages and oversees its development.

pakistani etiquette

Pakistanis have a complex code of conduct, dominated by the concepts of social status, family (or clan) reputation and wealth. Moreover, this applies not only to the Muslims of the country, but, in most cases, it has taken root among both Hindus and Christians. From the culture of Hinduism, instead, a rather strict division into classes came (a kind of relic of the caste system), within which there is a rather thin and incomprehensible social hierarchy to a foreigner. The tribal system in Balochistan and Punjab is very strong and is a powerful political factor in the life of the whole country, and temporary or permanent tribal associations replace political parties here (often members of the same party or faction are members of the same clan or tribe, although this is not officially emphasized).

And just like in India, in Pakistan, instead of toilet paper, a local analogue of a bidet or just a jug of water is used. All natural needs are sent by local men while sitting, and often any more or less closed place is used for these purposes: city ditches, sidewalks, wastelands, roadsides and the like (there is a centralized sewerage system only in large cities, and even then not everywhere) . Swimming is accepted only in running water, therefore, there are practically no baths anywhere.

Pakistanis are a religious people. Everywhere you can see people praying, some drivers of minibuses and buses stop right on their route, get out of the transport and, along with all the passengers, perform namaz (prayer).

Of the strict local “taboos”, one should strictly take into account the rules traditional for many countries of the Islamic world: one should not pass in front of a praying person, one should not point the soles of the feet at other people (even when visiting a house or a mosque, when you need to take off your shoes, you should fold your shoes with the sole to the sole and put in a specially designated place), you should not accept or serve anything with your left hand (it is used for personal hygiene) and especially - take food with it, washing your hands before and after eating is mandatory, you can not touch a person’s head (especially a child, yes and just touching other people is not recommended), you can not enter the female half of the house, and so on. It is customary to say hello in a completely European way, but, again, only with the right hand (hugs and kisses are quite acceptable between well-known people, you can often meet men walking down the street holding hands - this is quite acceptable between friends). Special attention should be paid to gestures - like many residents of the Middle East and Arab countries, Pakistanis use a complex system of gestures in communication, while many of our everyday movements may well turn out to be offensive according to local concepts.

Only closed clothing is considered acceptable, down to jeans and a long-sleeved shirt or sweater. Women should avoid wearing short skirts and dresses with short sleeves. When visiting places of worship, the entire body, except for the feet and ankles, must be closed, women are required to wear a headscarf.

Pakistanis know how to meet and receive a guest, even if their house does not shine with prosperity. Pakistanis are quite friendly to all, without exception, foreign citizens. They are very kind to those who do not violate their customs and traditions, but are sympathetic to other people's mistakes, as a result of which, here it is enough to simply observe all decorum.

To refuse an invitation, or to make an offer to contribute to a banquet that is not planned is desirable - it will be easier to offer to present small gifts to the owners of the house - sweets, flowers, souvenirs, or tobacco, but by no means alcohol.

Urdu

In Pakistan, despite the small proportion of people for whom Urdu is native (only about 7% of the country's population, most of them are Muhajirs who came from India due to religious oppression), this language has an official status. Urdu is a language closely related to Hindi. Urdu is understood to varying degrees by most of the Pakistani population and is widely used as a lingua franca as well as in the education system. Urdu is a compulsory subject in all high schools in the country, regardless of the language of instruction. This has led to the fact that quite often people can read and write in Urdu, but cannot do it in their own language. The close ties between Urdu and the regional languages of Pakistan contribute to their interaction and mutual enrichment.

On September 8, 2015, the Supreme Court of Pakistan ordered the administrative institutions to expand the use of the Urdu language (reducing the use of English where possible) and also set a three-month deadline for all provincial and federal laws to be translated into Urdu.

English is understood by more than 20% of the population of cities, primarily by the educated segments of society, in the provinces it is almost never used, however, all signs and road signs are often duplicated in English. English is also used in trade, tourism, business and government correspondence.

Religion of Pakistan

Islam entered northwest India during the Arab conquests. The population of the Indus Valley (modern Pakistan) fully converted to Islam in the 9th - 11th centuries. In those days, Islam had not yet affected the population of the Hindustan peninsula and the Ganges valley, although the coastal population got acquainted with Islam through Arab merchants. Islam's influence was negligible until 1001, when Mahmud of Ghazni raided the subcontinent, destroyed Somnath, the center of Buddhism, and captured the Punjab. A new wave of Islamization from 1526 to 1858 was brought with them by the Turkic, Persian and Mongol warriors who seized power in North India.

The most disadvantaged sections of the Hindu population converted to Islam, hoping, in this way, to overcome the rigid system of prohibitions and castes that limited social mobility. Masses of poor farmers in the Ganges delta (modern) were converted to Islam. The urban elite and merchants also showed a tendency to convert to Islam to facilitate access to the courts of the Muslim emirs, who constituted the new elite of the region.

In March 1949, the government declared Islam the sole state religion of Pakistan. In 1950, Pakistan's constitution was amended on the basis of Sharia, according to the 22 Ulema Clauses introduced by the Ulema Council of Pakistan. The educational system of Pakistan is based on the dominance of Islamic values, where theology is the main discipline, along with academic subjects and languages.

President Zulfiqar Ali Bhutto banned alcohol in 1977, as well as drugs. The day off was moved from Sunday to Friday. An intensive program of Islamization of society was carried out by General Zia-ul-Haq. From February 1979, new laws based on Islamic principles came into force. For example, for desecration of the Koran, a person can be sentenced to death. A number of laws provide for harsher penalties for women than for men. A Muslim mandatory annual tax “in favor of the poor” was introduced, as well as on the spread of Islam and knowledge about it (“zakat”), and interest-bearing bank loans were prohibited. However, the “Pakistani version” of Islam is somewhat more tolerant of manifestations of dissent, and secular traditions are also very strong in the life of the country itself.

Today, Muslims make up about 96% of the country's population. 91% of Pakistanis are Sunnis, 5% are Shiites. Pakistan ranks second in the world in terms of the number of Muslims, after.

Pakistani clothing

In Pakistan, you rarely see a person dressed in European style. All Pakistanis wear the national dress "shalwar kameez". These are loose trousers (“shalwar”) gathered at the ankles and waist in combination with a long shirt (“kameez”). Moreover, in each of the Pakistani provinces, the “shalwar kameez” has its own characteristics: in the northwest, they often wear a “tailcoat” (a long fitted dress and a wide skirt-trousers), in Balochistan, the “shalwar” is noticeably longer and very wide (here they are called "garara"), in Sind instead of "shalwar" a wide skirt is used, and the shirt has a short sleeve. In Punjab, instead of a shalwar, women usually wear a loose sarong-like lungi cape, while men wear a dhoti skirt, a loose jacket and a pugri turban.

Pakistani women can, unlike Iranians, wear clothes other than black. Mandatory, what should
to be present in a woman's clothes is a scarf. You can wear jeans, but be sure to wear a scarf. In other words, "You may not be Pakistani, but you must wear a scarf." This is a tribute to the country, traditions, elders. On festive occasions, women wear multi-colored saris, gharar (a looser equivalent of shalwar), while men complement their clothes with an embroidered vest and turban, or wear European-style clothes.

Women pay special attention to jewelry, first of all, “churiya” bracelets (for unmarried girls they are made of plastic and glass, for married girls they are gold, moreover, their quantity, quality and shape indicate the degree of solvency of their owner), rings and pendants “nat ”, as well as massive “jumka” earrings. The veil here is a relatively rare item of women's wardrobe. A large coverlet is called a “veil” and is used to visit mosques and other places of worship, although in the form of colorful “dupatta” and “chaddar” scarfs, its variants are used everywhere (the decoration of such wraps is a separate branch of local arts and crafts). In families with more strict traditions (Pashtun), women wear black headscarves and a black long dress. Small children are dressed as in Russia, but from the age of 4-5 they are dressed in Pakistani style.

The Khussa, a leather shoe with a turned up toe, is considered to be the traditional Pakistani footwear.

Pakistanis attitude towards money

Pakistanis are a nation corrupt to the core. Here everything is decided by money, and when you have it, you can solve any problems. To order a terrorist attack, to remove a person you don't like, not to go to jail, to bribe the police, in the end, to kill someone or cut the whole family and go unpunished - these are ordinary, quite acceptable things for Pikastan. And, perhaps, this is one of the main and worst qualities of the people of this country, which, until now, cannot take a step towards the West, towards civilization. Many developed countries perceive Pakistan as a country of primitive wild people, some kind of thugs who, in any case, will go unpunished for any deeds - and the same corruption is to blame. Everyone is corrupt - from the police to the officials and even the president of the country himself. Pakistan is mired in corruption and will not get rid of it for a long time.

In Pakistan, on every street, near every store, you can see crowds of beggars. This is done by children, and adults, and the elderly. It is very difficult to find a job, and why work when you can beg. They are all very arrogant and stubborn. They will pull you by the hands, accompany you to your house, stubbornly call you at the door until you give them money. Yes, yes, it is money, because nothing else interests them. If you give the cakes, they will be thrown into the trash cans.

Pakistanis all want money. "Who doesn't want them?" - you ask. Yes, everything is correct, but Pakistanis have a special attitude towards money. To put it mildly, they will stop at nothing. Lies, extortion, outright begging - everything is used. And if you do not give in - in the end, you can just steal the money. This applies not only to beggars - this is the attitude of many Pakistanis towards money. Even a reputable businessman in a business suit will try to fool you (no, of course he will not steal money and beg), hang noodles on your ears (oh, the Pakistanis know how to do this!), Promise mountains of gold in order to conclude a contract that is profitable for him (and, again, - still, get your interest from the deal) - the Pakistanis know how, and be sure, most likely, this will happen. It can be said that it is in their blood to compose beautiful fables, and they often believe in them themselves.

Pakistani wedding

Marriage in Pakistan is a legal union between a man and a woman. This is not only a bond between husband and wife, but also a union between their families. About 97% of the population of Pakistan are Muslims and they generally follow the laws of Islam. Newlyweds entering into marriage make nikah, as well as registration with state bodies, which is a requirement of the law. Polygamy is permitted in Pakistan, under the Marriage Act 1965, with the proviso that the first wife gives written, certified permission. But polygamy is becoming rarer and rarer, especially in urban areas.

There are two types of marriages in Pakistan. A semi-arranged marriage is when the couple makes a decision and the marriage is fully arranged, without compromise, between the potential bride and groom, where the decision of the parents is final. Dating with disapproval in Pakistani society, so far, is unacceptable. However, Pakistani youth have adopted Western courtship practices. Dating has become a new phenomenon, but it happens "behind the scenes" in order to protect the honor of the family. Semi-arranged marriages are found among the liberal and educated urban population, fully arranged marriages are most often observed in rural areas.

It takes a long time before the final marriage in Pakistan. The preparation time for the wedding can take more than a year. When the date of marriage approaches, all close relatives are invited, which requires significant funds for their accommodation. Sometimes the wedding date is postponed due to the fact that not all relatives can arrive at the wedding venue. Wedding customs and celebrations also vary significantly, depending on the geographical location. However, a typical Pakistani wedding has at least three main customs associated with the ceremony: it is the henna ceremony - Rasme Henna, nikah, which is part of the actual wedding, or the Shaadi ceremony followed by the Walima ceremony - the marriage feast offered by the family. groom.

All marriages, as a rule, are arranged by kinship, or within the same clan, that is, communities. A girl, in principle, does not have the opportunity to meet somewhere with a man who does not belong to her family. In marriage, priority is given to cousins, then to second cousins, and finally to girls of the same clan or tribe. In Pakistan, they may well marry their children: 9 out of 10 marriages are between relatives. Often these can be siblings. This is convenient, because, in this way, the entire land allotment remains in the ownership of one family, which is very important for local residents. Marriages for love are made only in large cities. Usually, men marry closer to thirty years, and girls are married before they reach twenty years of age. Most brides are 15 - 18 years old. Girls in adolescence begin to prepare for housekeeping, sewing and cooking.

The proposal is made at the bride's house, where the groom's parents and family elders formally ask the bride's parents for her hand in marriage. In religious families, when the offer is accepted, the families recite Surah Al-Fatiha and then tea and refreshments are served. Depending on individual family traditions, the bride may be presented with jewelry and a variety of gifts. Rings and other pieces of jewelry among wealthy families are exchanged between a potential bride and groom. Traditionally, the bride and groom do not sit together; either the groom's mother or sister puts the ring on the bride's finger. Recently, the separation of functions has become rare and the couple themselves exchange rings.

A Pakistani wedding involves a four-day ritual. This number of days allocated for the festival is traditional.

The first day is significant in that the families of the bride and groom separately from each other celebrate the upcoming marriage. It is important that on this day everyone is dressed in yellow clothes. At the same time, the bride and groom are also in different companies, and indeed, they cannot see each other until the ceremony itself.

On the second day, Mehndi is celebrated. Mendi or Mendi is a big holiday, on this day the groom's family brings the bride her wedding dress. On the same day, the groom also takes care of his wedding attire. The bride's house is decorated and colored with lights, because everyone in the neighborhood should know what the holiday is in the house. On the same day, the ceremony of staining the hands and feet of the bride with henna takes place. Specially invited masters paint the bride's legs and arms with intricate patterns, each of which is based on a special romantic symbol, image. Often, the whole family takes part in the procedure for coloring the legs and hands of the bride.

On the third day, nikah takes place and then the wedding takes place. Nikah is the official wedding ceremony. The marriage contract is signed by the bride and groom in the presence of parents and close relatives. Without nikah, the marriage contract is considered invalid. This ceremony is performed by a religious person who has a license issued by the government to perform this ritual. Nikah is an Islamic marriage ceremony. The bride and groom must both have two witnesses present in order to testify that the marriage was consensual. Religious and civil ceremonies are held almost simultaneously, and all this time the Koran is held over the heads of the young.

The outfits of the newlyweds must be red, and the dress and veil of the bride delight in finishing and an abundance of ornaments and jewels. The groom is also dressed quite elegantly, and he has a beautiful turban on his head. After nikah, the ceremony of showing the face. Sometimes this ceremony is held after the bride enters her husband's house.

The wedding (“Shaadi”) takes place in the bride's house, where large wedding tents are set up in the garden or near the house. Now it is customary to hold such events in large halls at hotels or other public institutions. The bride's family is fully responsible for receiving guests and holding such an event.

At a wedding feast in Pakistan, tea is always served, which Pakistanis love very much and can drink at any time of the day and in any quantity. There are also a lot of sweets at weddings in Pakistan. The most common wedding dish in Pakistan is chicken curry served with pilaf. The traditional wedding dessert is “firni”, made from cream, rice and milk. This dessert is served in clay saucers decorated with silver foil.

The Sending Off Ceremony - occurs when the groom and his family leave the bride's house with the bride. This is a dark period for parents as their daughter leaves home. The departure of the bride from her parents' house is a very emotional scene when she says goodbye to her home, her parents, her brothers and sisters to start a new family life.

On the fourth wedding day, a new married couple receives guests in their new capacity. All guests gather in the groom's house, where they sit down at the wedding tables and eat, dance and sing songs.

Pakistani weddings usually have around 300 guests. Since the percentage of wealthy citizens in this country is small, the state even tried to ease the costs of the hosts by banning food for guests at weddings. This ban has now been lifted.

After the girl is married, the main event in her life is the birth of children.

Pakistani family

Pakistan has big families. All relatives quite often communicate and visit each other. At the same time, everyone tries to observe family traditions, according to Islam.

Respect for elders has a very important place in the local culture. Older people often live together
with their children and enjoy unquestioned authority, both men and women. The oldest man is consulted on every serious issue that directly concerns family interests, and the opinion of the elder is taken into account on a par with such respected and revered people as a qadi or a mullah.All important events in the life of the family are celebrated by the whole family, often with all relatives and friends, and it is the elders who determine the correspondence of festive etiquette to traditions, which is very important.

Children in Pakistani families are considered gifts from Allah himself, and therefore, the most reverent attitude is applied to them. There are a lot of large families in Pakistan. At least 3 - 4 children in each family. The position of women is, for the most part, similar to that of women in the rest of the Muslim world. The most important role for a woman is a wife and mother of children, preferably sons. Sons are generally preferred over daughters, since sons provide support to aged parents, and the dowry of daughters at their marriage often places a heavy burden on the shoulders of parents, and they, for many years, cannot pay off their debts.

When the children grow up, the status of the mother also rises, especially if she has several sons. Families with marriageable daughters turn to her in search of suitors. Often mothers have great influence over their sons. In old age, women switch to raising grandchildren.

In Pakistan, the closest relatives are often married, and such closely related marriages have a bad effect on the health of the offspring. Anencephaly (babies without a skull), babies with hernias, midgets are often born. Many children are born with mental disorders, schizophrenia.

Pakistani mothers are distinguished by their peculiar upbringing of children. For example, some feed a child 3 - 4
months of spicy, fried pies. Others try to teach a 6-month-old baby to walk, holding him by one hand, but when attempts fail, he lets go of his hand and the child remains lying on the pavement, or they put a 2-month-old child on a chair, who, with all his desire, cannot sit . This is common everywhere, as Pakistanis teach their children to be independent.

There are 2 education systems in Pakistan: public and private schools. Paid education is not cheap for Pakistan, the average cost is from $30 to $100 per month. And, at the same time, classes are overcrowded in all schools. Schools have preschool - these are groups for children from 3 years old, here they play, draw, sing songs for 3 hours a day. From the age of 5, children study in schools, boys and girls study together, and in the upper grades, education is separate, and not just separate classes, but separate schools. Even in private schools. All students wear school uniforms. Each school has its own uniform. Most often, children study only 5 subjects: Urdu, English, mathematics, Islam and science (there are physics, and geography, and biology, and chemistry).

Everyone brings food with them. Before eating, all the children read the words of a prayer in unison... In general, religious education occupies not the last place here. Every school, every class from elementary to high school has Islamic lessons every day, six days a week. Importantly, the lessons teach both the history of religion and religion itself. Between lessons, as elsewhere, there are big changes. The boys play volleyball, and the girls sit and watch on the benches... Jokes, running around, ordinary children's life... But, at the same time, you can notice certain specifics that we don't have: respect for elders, respect for guests, special attitude towards girls. By the way, for girls - school, one of the places where you can not cover your face. At the same time, the norms of behavior and permissibility, girls learn and adopt from their parents and sisters almost from the cradle.

Pakistan is an Islamic country and abortion is prohibited by the state and religion. But, for a lot of money and an acquaintance, everything can be done. Doctors who perform abortions are very risky. They could lose their license to practice medicine forever. After the operation, you will not come to your senses yet, and you will be thrown out of the hospital. But who is not afraid to get involved with this is midwives. They do not risk anything, because they do not have a license anyway. They do an abortion for little money, at home and WITHOUT ANESTHESIA. Poor women….

pakistani women

The position of women in local society is rather peculiar. On the one hand, Pakistan is one of the most "Europeanized" countries of the Islamic world, where women have wide access to both public life and education, as well as politics (suffice it to say that this is the only state in the Muslim world where a woman for a long time even ruled the country). However, within the family or community, the status of a woman is determined by the traditions and values of Islam, which are unusually strong in this aspect. In many southern regions where Hindu influence is strong, the situation of women is not much different from the countries of Southeast Asia, while at the same time, in the mountainous regions of the northern and northwestern provinces, the norms are noticeably stricter.

They cannot drive a car, vote, leave the house without a male escort. No, legally no one forbids them to do this and they will not be stoned to death. Just people will judge and whisper. In Pakistan, a woman only takes care of children and family, even with higher education, or if her husband studied abroad. Communication of wives with compatriots or other foreigners is not welcome.

In general, women in Pakistan age quickly, by the age of thirty they look forty-five. By this time they already have 7 - 8 children, and they can even become grandmothers. And yes, they work a lot.

Absolutely wild rumors constantly circulate about the attitude towards women in Pakistan. And I must say, in part, they, unfortunately, are not groundless. In most parts of the country, women cannot even leave the house without the permission of their husband or family members. As a result of violence based on family honor in Pakistan, about 1,000 women die every year (!!!). And in the ranking of the most dangerous countries for the life of women, Pakistan ranks third.

Hundreds of women die each year in honor killings in Pakistan. Statistically,
published by the Human Rights Commission of Pakistan, there were 869 "honor killings" in 2017. Basically, killers get away with it because of the law, which allows the victim's family to forgive the killer, often also a relative. In addition, the laws of Pakistan allow the killer to be exempted from prosecution if the victim's family pardons him. There are absolutely wild cases.

For example, famous Pakistani model and social media star Kandil Baloch, 26, died at the hands of her brother, who drugged and strangled her because she continued to post provocative photos and videos on Facebook (no, she didn't post nude photos, but European standards, so there was nothing indecent at all). He stated that he was not ashamed of his sister's death, and this provoked a wave of calls to stop honor killings.

What do you think about the murder of a pregnant woman? The lynching of the victim was arranged by relatives who did not like her marriage. The daring crime was committed in the city center, next to the courthouse, in front of passers-by. The girl was 25 years old, she was in her third month of pregnancy. She was married to 45-year-old Muhammad Iqbal. However, the girl's relatives were against their relationship. The girl's relatives demanded kalym from Muhammad, but Iqbal did not establish contacts with them in the traditional way, but simply registered his marriage with Farzana. This angered her family.

After the wedding, nevertheless, took place, the father of the bride, Mohammed Azim, turned to the police and accused Iqbal of kidnapping his daughter. Angry relatives of the girl waited for the young people on the street, fired several shots into the air, and then began to beat the girl, who allegedly dishonored the honor of the family with her marriage. The massacre ended with the fact that the victim was thrown with bricks taken at the nearest construction site. Farzana died on the spot from her injuries. It was established that about 20 relatives, among whom were the father and brothers of the victim, took part in the massacre. The girl's father does not repent of his deed. “I killed my daughter because she insulted our entire family by marrying without the consent of her relatives,” he said. He called the massacre an "honor killing." The most shameful and frightening circumstance is that the victim was killed near the courthouse.

Conflicts of families are resolved very interestingly, the method of “settlement” of which is often women. Here is just one example for you: a conflict began between two families due to the fact that a representative of one of the families sexually abused a representative of another family. After that, the relatives of the rapist asked the relatives of the injured woman for forgiveness. The injured party agreed to come to reconciliation, but put one condition. Guided by an ancient custom ("an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth"), the victim's relatives demanded that they be given the opportunity to abuse the rapist's sister in revenge. His family agreed. "Peacekeeping" rape was carried out.

A similar incident occurred not so long ago in the vicinity of the city of Sultan. There, a village gathering sentenced to rape the 16-year-old sister of the rapist, who had previously abused a 12-year-old girl. The girl was raped by the brother of the victim, and her parents, elders and dozens of fellow villagers who participated in the gathering watched the execution.

And in the province of Punjab, a young married (!) Girl was raped. The attackers carried out the will of the council of elders, who decided to punish the victim for the "unauthorized" marriage. The 19-year-old victim was married to her lover. However, the village elders did not approve of this family union, since the newlyweds did not turn to them for blessing (!). The elders convened a village council, at which they decided to rape the woman as punishment for disrespect for the opinion of the elders. The sentence was carried out by three members (!!!) of the village council, who abused the victim.

Do you think these are some unique out of the ordinary cases? No, these are ordinary, quite life situations in Pakistan. A woman has no rights. A raped young lady often becomes an outcast of society (they say she is to blame), and rapists and murderers, as a rule, go unpunished and are not prosecuted by law in any way, such are the laws in Pakistan. Yet it was done for the "honor" of the family! Unfortunately, even in our time, massacres of women in Pakistan happen daily ...

Pakistani men

As in any Islamic country, Pakistani men have a number of advantages over women. Well, let's start with the fact that Islam allows you to have four wives. But a woman cannot have more than one husband, in addition, a woman can simply be killed for treason and any offense.

Obviously, Pakistani men really like this approach, therefore, they are all quite jealous related to matters of faith and Islam.

Pakistani men are lazy in daily household chores. They will never run around the house with a hammer or move furniture. It's not for them.

But Pakistani men love children very much. Sons - this is a separate song, this is their pride! They can easily stay awake at night, babysitting a screaming baby.

Pakistani men are very frugal, or stingy if you will. Until a man earns enough, in his opinion, the amount, he saves on everything, while not cutting back on food and tasty treats. And Pakistanis love to eat very much, and, moreover, it is delicious. Well, what man does not love?

Pakistani men are not philosophers, they don’t like to talk about life, they don’t like to solve problems, and they believe that the Quran or “all will be the will of Allah” answered all questions a long time ago. And rightly so, why bother with absolutely unnecessary problems and worries - after all, everything will be decided by itself, Allah will do everything.

They, for the most part, do not read fiction - they believe that reading is a synonym for learning and nothing more. Well, if they say they like to read, then most likely it will turn out to be professional literature. Instead of literature, many own the philosophical poem "qawvali".

The average Pakistani man takes a very long time to make a decision. Even in small things. If a decision needs to be made, the Pakistanis are dragging their feet to the last and will be very happy to shift the responsibility to someone else. At the same time, they do a lot with an eye on “the neighbor” - what he thinks or says. This is very important here, no one wants to be judged.

Pakistani men often have the principle "everything around is collective farm, everything around is mine." They are shaking for their own things, but for others they will break and not even apologize. As if that's how it was.

Another national feature that immediately catches your eye is that despite the fact that all Pakistanis are great scavengers and litter everything around them, they are very scrupulous about personal hygiene. They always have clean and trimmed fingernails and toenails, they never smell of sweat, only good perfume. Which, you see, is nice!

Pakistani men love beautiful and expensive clothes, but they absolutely do not know how to wear them. In view of the fact that traditional Pakistani clothing is very comfortable and practical, beautiful things in Pakistani are easily turned into rags - stained, torn, instructed holes and so on. Well, not theirs, wear nice clothes.

Pakistani men are absolutely not punctual. If you make an appointment, for example, at 10 am, then
by 13.00 it is possible to hope that the meeting will take place. Besides, a Pakistani cannot be forced to do anything. He will constantly shirk, come up with excuses, lie, but only to play for time. In the end, you have to do everything yourself.

In general, Pakistani men are incredible storytellers. They love to make up incredible excuses instead of telling the truth, if there is an opportunity to lie at least in something, then they will not miss it. They can "pour into the ears" endlessly, promise mountains of gold, heaven on earth and other romantic garbage. They do it so beautifully and skillfully, as if lying is in their blood. That is why Pakistani men are in high demand with women who are known to love with their ears…

Pakistani men love to talk about politics, condemn the whole world and get involved in all sorts of demonstrations. They live by the principle "there are 2 opinions - mine and the wrong one." If they find out that your opinion is wrong, they will in every way guide you on the true path, involving a bunch of other people in the process. In the end, they will not rest until you admit your mistake and "repent of what you have done."

Sex with pakistani

The word "sex" is not spoken aloud in Pakistan. Both the word itself and the actions associated with it are directly associated with sin, guilt and shame. Sex before marriage for a girl is generally a taboo!

Intimacy before marriage in Pakistan is not recognized at all. Even the bride and groom cannot afford this, because in this case the engagement is broken and the guy has to run away so that the bride's relatives do not kill him. Those girls who dared, out of great love, nevertheless, to enter into an intimate relationship with a guy, risk their lives. A strict father can shoot his daughter for dishonoring the family. Girls are afraid of condemnation, some commit suicide. Since sexual education in this country is completely absent, due to carelessness, many girls become pregnant, and in order not to disgrace, again, the family, they secretly have abortions. Abortions are done clandestinely and naturally, not by professionals, very often I make money, without anesthesia, in unsanitary conditions, somewhere in basements, therefore, after such abortions, many girls die. So sex before marriage among Pakistani girls is more an exception than a rule.

But men are not allowed to have sex before marriage. But, in fact, with whom to do it, if the girls are not allowed? The exit has been found. This is a paradox - but in a strict Muslim country there are a huge number of ... gays. In Pakistan, extramarital affairs are discouraged for men, and often their first sexual experience is with male friends or cousins. Many consider it an integral part of growing up, boyish pranks and do not pay attention. No one will pay attention to sex between men if they do not perceive it as a challenge to tradition or religion. Eventually, everyone will marry someone of the opposite sex.

Many will even call the port city of Karachi "a paradise for gay men." Underground parties, group sex at the temple and marriages of convenience with members of the opposite sex are just some of the surprises Pakistan has to offer. Hidden under a thin veil of strict social conformity is a seething gay life.

They find each other very easily. There are smartphone apps that use GPS to determine where other gay men registered on the sites are. Thousands of gay men are online in Pakistan at any given time. There are many gay parties in Pakistan. Parties organized for special invitees give gay people the opportunity to speak openly about their sexuality. Sex between men also occurs in some public places, including, oddly enough, at Karachi's busiest shrine.

Families of believers come to the mausoleum of Sufi teacher Abdullah Shah Ghazi to ask for Allah's blessings, but it is also the most famous place in Karachi for those looking for casual acquaintances. Every Thursday, after sunset, men from all over the city gather there. They huddle in tight circles, and those on the periphery of the circle begin to paw those in the middle. To outsiders, it looks like a dense crowd. Some describe what is happening as a "mysterious religious ceremony." For the participants, it's just anonymous group sex. This, of course, is not welcomed by the religious authorities of Pakistan.

Pakistani society is aggressively patriarchal. Every man is expected to marry a woman, and every woman is expected to marry a man. The vast majority do just that. And the result is a whole culture of dishonesty and double living. Gay men try not to commit themselves to long-term same-sex relationships because they know that one day they will have to marry a woman anyway. After marriage, they treat their wives well, but at the same time continue to have sex with other men.

It is easy to buy sex from "boys walakh" - masseurs offering massage and "additional services" for about $ 10. Such masseurs often buy "services" from quite important people - police officers, army officers, and ministers too. Such massage therapists are very popular and earn good money, often in a few years of "work" they have sex with more than 3 thousand (!) Partners. From such figures it immediately becomes clear the extent of homosexuality in Pakistan. At the same time, as expected, masseurs often have several wives and many children, that is, they live quite a normal normal Pakistani life. Wives treat their husband's double life with understanding, and often, even with approval - there is no work in Pakistan, but here you can earn quite good, by Pakistani standards, money.

Formally, same-sex intercourse is a criminal offense in Pakistan. The law criminalizing "unnatural sex" was brought to the country by the British during the colonial era. Since the 1980s, "Sharia law" has been introduced in Pakistan, also punishing same-sex sexual activity. In practice, however, these laws are rarely enforced, and those who break them are more often dealt with within the family. Families make these guys get married as soon as possible.

There was a case when two boys were caught having sex in a field. The boys' families first tried to bribe the police to keep the story from getting publicized. The police did not succumb to bribery. Then they asked to change one detail. Both families wanted their son to be presented as an active sexual partner. They would be more ashamed if their son were presented as a passive partner.

And the life of lesbians is even more difficult. In Pakistani society, even heterosexual women avoid showing their sexuality. And how do lesbians arrange their lives?

Many marry by calculation ... for the same gays. Some invest in a common house, and live - gays in one room, lesbians in the other. For people, they are just two happy families. Many of them are waiting for the issue of gay rights to be openly discussed in Pakistan and people to be able to speak freely about their homosexuality. Changes will not happen soon, maybe in generations. Even for liberal Pakistanis, religious violence and economic instability are more important.

Pakistani society clearly shows how certain rules and prohibitions can radically change the lives of people, a whole generation, a whole society. Think for yourself - if there weren't so many prohibitions on sex, if you could do sex education with your children - there wouldn't be so many gays and lesbians in Pakistan. If Pakistani society accepted same-sex love - gay people could marry their lovers and most would not be promiscuous - and as a result a lot of infections, diseases and deaths. This is the result of any religion that prohibits what is not beneficial to the state. As a result: deceit, a double life and a marriage of convenience. And a bunch of crippled lives ...

Marry a Pakistani

Pakistanis from “wealthy” families often leave to study in Russia or the CIS countries. Basically, they study to be doctors, architects. There, under the sweet speeches of the Pakistanis, our Slavic ladies are melting, therefore, many Pakistanis have Russian wives. Pakistanis joke about this: “I left to study in Russia and came with a “scandal” - this means that I married a Russian. And the brother returned from Russia without a "scandal" - that means he returned unmarried. By the way, very beautiful children are born in these mixed marriages. Even there are blondes, with fair skin and blue eyes. Absolutely opposite type to Pakistani. There are not only Russian wives, but also American and English women.

The burning eyes of Pakistani men, their tenderness and temperament rarely leave any of the Slavs indifferent. And many single girls who are disappointed in the men of the “domestic manufacturer”, and women who walk alone for a long time, holding hands tightly, take risks and fall into the maelstrom of beautiful phrases and promises of Pakistanis.

But, marrying a Pakistani is not so easy. Wherever you meet - in Pakistan, in Russia or in one of the other CIS countries - most likely, your boyfriend is already married. And maybe even has more than one wife and a dozen children. This point will need to be found out first of all if you really want to marry him. Asking him directly about it is useless, Pakistani men will pour sweet words into their ears, and lie, lie, lie, looking straight into their eyes ... unfortunately, this is their national character trait. Of course, there are exceptions to these rules, but these are exceptions ... and there are few of them ...

Let's say your boyfriend is not married - and this is a huge plus for you, everything is serious with you and it's going to the wedding. The degree of love goes off scale, and you are ready with it even to the ends of the world. Where will you live? If in your country, in Europe or in some more or less other normal country, then you are just lucky. And if he takes you to Pakistan, then this is a tryndet ...

If you still don’t understand why, then read this entire article again. Of course, you are not a Pakistani lady, of course there will be a number of concessions for you. But, you are, first of all, a woman - and only then a Slav or a lady of European appearance. Therefore, traditions and customs will still have to be observed. Most likely, you will have to forget about any work forever, you will only have to deal with the house and future kids. About religion, the question is also a separate one, if your man is an adequate person - he will not insist on accepting Islam for you, but in most cases this cannot be avoided, especially under pressure from her husband's relatives.

By the way, in life, a Pakistani husband comes with all his Pakistani relatives. Over the years, the ranks of relatives become denser and thicker. And everyone wants to eat, and it is better to eat well. But... people living in Pakistan are very fond of having children, but they do not like to work - therefore, the few who want to work for their families are sent to work in the Emirates and other countries where decent earnings can be found. It is possible that your Pakistani husband will give you children, and in order to feed all the mouths he will leave to work in another country for several years, leaving you in the care of his family. These are fairly common cases.

Pakistanis honor the image of a woman-mother, the keeper of the hearth. Therefore, his mother is the first person with whom you will have to make friends and help her in everything and give in. If you do not find mutual understanding with your mother-in-law, most likely, your marriage with a Pakistani will be doomed, the Pakistani family will eventually survive the hated and useless daughter-in-law.

For a European woman, at first, it is quite difficult to follow the Muslim rules of conduct. Even if you have not converted to Islam, you will have to wrap yourself in clothes, cover your entire body (even in the crazy heat, which is not uncommon in Pakistan), behave very modestly and restrained, and not leave the house alone without a man. Even if you are confident in yourself, you should not do this - remember that Pakistani relatives are watching you everywhere. In addition to relatives, you will be watched by neighbors, friends, colleagues - everyone who catches your eye. If you do something wrong, gossip and condemnation will begin, and for Pakistanis it is extremely important what friends and neighbors think about them.

Of course, unless you are a rich bride who periodically throws money at all Pakistani relatives, it will be quite difficult to establish good relations with her husband's Pakistani family. Of course, they would all like a Pakistani wife for your husband. She will follow all the traditions, decent to the point of disgrace, and like a daughter-in-law, it is much easier for her to manage and command, because Pakistani women have a real problem with self-esteem.

In a word - if you are not a Muslim, do not meddle in Pakistan, life in Pakistan will seem like hell to you, at least at first. A bunch of rules and prohibitions will not be saved by any love and passion. If you are so in love with your Pakistani and you can’t see life without him, it’s best for you to live with him in any other country, but not in Pakistan.

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Saira Liaquat doing makeup for a client. The girl is grateful that in the rehabilitation center she was entrusted with the work of a beautician, but she worries that her poor eyesight may let her down. I have been thinking for a long time ... to post or not to post this material, but recently there are a lot of similar posts on blogs and I decided. But still, another impetus came from a book I started reading the other day, Souad, Burned Alive. She was burned because she fell in love. A young girl, Suad, from a small Palestinian village, fell in love with a neighbor and became pregnant from him. It was a terrible sin, for which she was burned by her own family. But the girl was saved by an employee of a humanitarian organization. Suad was cured and taken to Europe. A few years ago, Suad's book "Burned Alive" became an all-European bestseller, and was also published in Russia by the Ripol Classic publishing house and very soon entered the bestseller lists of the Book Review newspaper. This is a post about girls and women living in Pakistan who suffered because of their beauty and rebelliousness. God forbid anyone like this! Saira Liaquat, 26, holds up a photo of herself at 16. At the age of 15, she married her relative, who later disfigured her for refusing to live with him. To try to get rid of the scars, Saira underwent 9 surgeries. She now works as a beautician at a rehabilitation center for women who have suffered from burns. 32-year-old Shanaz, a resident of the Pakistani city of Jhelum, was doused with acid 19 years ago by her relatives. Her parents refused to give their daughter in marriage to a guy from their own family. Shanaz had 8 plastic surgeries. Najaf Sultana, 16, was set on fire while sleeping by her own father at the age of 5. He just didn't want another girl in his family. As a result of the arson, the girl became blind, and her parents abandoned her. Now she lives with her relatives. Najaf has undergone 15 plastic surgeries. Uruj Akbar, 28, gets her nails done at a Pakistani rehab center. About three years ago, an angry husband doused the girl with kerosene while she was sleeping and set her on fire. Uruj spends the money earned from his work to support his daughter, whom she hardly sees after the incident. 16-year-old Atiya Khalil was poured with acid by the relatives of a neighbor's boyfriend 3 years ago after the girl did not want to become his wife. Atia had gone under the surgeon's knife three times already. Irum Said, a 30-year-old resident of Islamabad, suffered 12 years ago from a guy she did not want to marry. Ob doused her face, shoulders and back right in the middle of the street. The girl underwent 25 plastic surgeries. Sabira Sultana, 30, puts on makeup at her home in Jhelum, Pakistan. A pregnant woman was doused with gasoline and set on fire by her husband because her parents gave insufficient dowry for their daughter. Sabira has undergone 20 plastic surgeries. Shamim Akhter, 18, poses for a photograph at her home in Jhang, Pakistan. Three years ago, she was raped by three guys, after which they doused her with acid. She underwent 10 operations in an attempt to regain her former appearance.