How a man treats his mistress in psychology. Psychology of relations with a married man: how it is to be a mistress What does a married man need from his mistress

April 22, 2017
  • How to send a married man away

Tell him how wonderful platonic love is and offer him just such an inspiring kind of relationship. Tell me that this is a wonderful spiritual practice that gives joy and mutual respect ... In 5 minutes, a married man will disappear from your field of vision.

  • How to make a married man think about you psychology

The best way to make you think about you is to flood a man with your intimate photos. You can also kidnap him, tie him to a chair and tell about yourself while he is immobilized. Thus, a man will think about you 24 hours a day!

  • How to be the best lover for a married man

Take a notebook and write it down so as not to lose it, or better yet, learn it by heart. To be the best lover you need: always look great, smile and enjoy even 15-minute meetings. Never ask for anything, otherwise you will scare the man away, he may think that you need more from him than just sex. Do not write or call him, married people do not like it - you have to delete calls and SMS so as not to burn yourself. Do not show him your bad mood, put your jealousy of your wife in the box, put your desires in the same place. Your task is to do as well as possible for what they come to you for. And they come to you to...

  • Why a married man does not call after sex

I don't even know what to advise. You don't think he's only with you for sex, do you? Married people are such busy people. Make a list of 100 excuses and hang it on the refrigerator so that it is always in front of your eyes.

  • How to keep a relationship with a married man longer
  • If a married man chose you as his mistress

Well, what's the question? Need to rejoice! You need to thank God that he sent you a married man "as a gift." You need to run and jump for happiness, because not everyone is so lucky - to be a mistress. It is so honorable - to be a secret woman, there is a special intrigue in this, not like with a single man, everything is predictable there, she wanted - she called, she wanted - we met. Everything is different here. There are secrets, expectations, hopes, intrigues, deceit. Everything is like in a soap series!

  • If a married man wants sex on the side and feeds his mistress with promises, what is it?

This is a married man. Did you think it would be different? Not every free man keeps his promises; I generally keep quiet about married men. Wanted to be a mistress - get and sign.

  • What kind of sex should be with a married man?

I can assume that sex with a married person should be about the same as with an unmarried ...

The only thing is that often married men have a mistress for some sexual variety, which cannot be realized with a wife. So my site was hit by the request "a married lover has set the condition for anal sex or will not meet." Are you ready for this twist? And what, nothing is a pity for a married man, are you in vain a mistress? Just like in a joke:

Izya, I heard you married a Russian? - Yes... - Why? - You know, Jewish women often get sick... - And Russians don't get sick? - They get sick, but they are not sorry.

  • Karma of a married man's mistress

My favorite question. It turns out that someone is interested in what it will be .. Have you not realized that you have already fallen into karma? Try to get out of these relationships and you will understand that in order to break these relationships, you need to tear a piece from yourself. This is the karma that you voluntarily subscribed to - strong affection and the expenditure of energy, youth and beauty on a married man. And at that time they could be the only and beloved woman of their man.

That's all for me. Please take my advice with humor - it was an irony that exposes the truth. In my article, I strongly recommend not to contact married people and break off relations if this does happen. I advise you to get out of the flawed role of a lover, because every person on earth was born in order to be happy. Relations with a married man is a loss of valuable time, strength and beauty. And most importantly, the loss of faith that you deserve better!

P.S. Male look at the mistress. These are the words of a man!

“To be the mistress of a married man and hope to start a family with his lover / sponsor, that he will divorce his wife, leave the children and go to her??? You have to be a complete idiot to think so ... in fairness, I note that there are SOME cases ... everything else is either lust or sexual promiscuity or part of the image and the concept of "a woman's need for a family" has nothing to do with the concept of "lover "... the concept of "mistress" historically and a priori EXCLUDES the goal of creating a family ... by the way, life shows that nothing good comes of this ... YOU CAN'T BUILD HAPPINESS ON ANOTHER MOUNTAIN ... "

Diary of a psychologist - Dayana Mir

Answers to questions about the love triangle for men and women.

The feeling of falling in love and the instinct to preserve the family push men and women to create family unions. Sometimes people feel their loneliness so keenly that they are ready to sacrifice a lot to find their soul mate. But after finding their beloved women and marrying them, men change their attitude towards them. After the seal of marriage appears in the passport, women turn from an object of worship into housekeepers, dishwashers, cooks and educators of children. Often in the list of these cases there is absolutely no communication and contact with the husband. Therefore, having found the ideal wife, men begin to look for the ideal lover.

What does the ideal wife look like in the eyes of a man?

  • She is great at cooking
  • She endlessly cleans up the family nest
  • She is dedicated to taking care of children.
  • She gets along with her mother-in-law and other in-laws of her husband

What does the ideal lover look like in the eyes of a man?

  • She is beautiful and knows how to take care of herself.
  • She never has a headache and is always ready for active sex
  • She does not walk around the house in a soiled bathrobe and house slippers.
  • She does not load the problems of the family budget and poor grades of children at school.


Can a woman combine an ideal wife and an ideal lover? Practice shows that this task turns out to be impossible for women because it is difficult for women to turn into a goddess of sex by playing the role of a voluntary slave of a plate and a doormat.



The number of divorces due to infidelity can be reduced by doing housework together

But, if she can shift at least some of the “light housework” onto her husband’s shoulders, she will have the time and desire to do new hairstyles, face and body skin care and new outfits. Since it turns out to be easier and much more interesting for a man to find a woman on the side, and not to unload his wife from domestic work, this task remains impossible for a woman.



Why does a married man need a mistress, what does a mistress mean to him, what does he expect from her?

The main reason why men start an affair on the side is the dissatisfaction of their sexual life with their wife. It can be difficult for husbands to understand what to expect from a woman who spins like a squirrel in the wheel of initiative and the realization of a man’s desires. If a woman works not only at home, but also goes to work, then returning home after a hard day, picking up her children from kindergarten or school, washing the dishes, and feeding her family dinner, she dreams not about sex, but to sleep.



A man, even if he went to work, but freed from domestic work, is full of energy and sexual desires. Perhaps many women will be surprised, but the vast majority of men, especially those under 30, want sex every day or every other day. If such a schedule does not coincide with the schedule of the wife's desires, he will seek satisfaction on the side.

As a result, by unloading a man from domestic work and loading themselves, women themselves create the prerequisites for her husband's infidelity.

Also, the reason that makes a man look for a mistress may not be the quantity, but the quality of sex. Many couples are shy or afraid to discuss these topics with each other. And it is difficult for them not only to express wishes about what they would like to receive from sex, but also difficult to talk about what they do not like in sexual intimacy.



What does a married man expect from his mistress?

Deciding on treason, a man expects sexual satisfaction from his mistress. But communication on the side involves not only having sex, but also communication. If scandals and showdowns occur in the family, and the lover knows how to listen and understand a man, then an affair on the side can lead to a divorce from his wife. Many single women, entering into a love affair with a married man, seek to divorce such a man from his wife. And to achieve this goal, they skillfully use the contrast that a man sees between his mistress and his wife.



The psychology of the relationship between a married man and his mistress

As a rule, a married man, meeting with his mistress, does not seek divorce and marry another woman. He is quite satisfied with the love triangle, where in the family circle he receives care from his wife, contact with his children, and from his mistress, complete satisfaction of sexual needs. Such a double life can cause him petty remorse and guilt towards his wife. Unfortunately, these negative emotions do not affect his intentions to leave this situation unchanged.



A woman who acts as a lover cannot but feel the inferiority of her position and will strive in every possible way to change it. If the mistress insists on a divorce, and the man opposes this, the idyll between her and a married man can be broken. This can lead to a break between them.



Can a married man love both his wife and his mistress: signs

The word "love" has different meanings for men and women. So for a woman, love can be synonymous with fidelity, devotion, a sense of inspiration and the desire to take care of a man. And for a man, “love” can mean a willingness to have sex with a woman. Can a man be willing to have sex with more than one woman? Definitely can and even aspires to it. This does not mean that in adultery with or without reason, you need to suspect every man. The presumption of innocence or lack of proof of a crime applies not only to hardened criminals, but also to husbands.



Can a married man be jealous of his mistress?

Jealousy or a sense of ownership is inherent in the relationship of a married man and his mistress. Despite the fact that in the life of a mistress he is only "coming for an hour", she can be jealous of his wife. In addition, she cannot but understand that she is not the only one to whom such a man could turn his attention. A man is able to be jealous of his mistress to other men and feel like the Sultan of a harem, where every concubine is his property.



Why do married men have young mistresses?

Often, older men have young mistresses in order to increase their self-esteem and increase potency, if there is a tendency for it to fade. This is because it is young women who have the strongest sexual attraction. They attract the attention of men, like females capable of procreation. Here play the role of pheromones, which smells like a young woman in the period of fertilization.



Can a mistress be older than a man?

Yes, young, sexually inexperienced men tend to have experienced mistresses older than them. If an elderly woman, in addition to successful sex, offers a young man delicious dinners, the ability to listen without getting irritated and give wise advice, such an alliance can be very successful.



How many mistresses can a married man have?

If a man is in excellent sexual shape and wants sex every day, then the number of his mistresses can equal the number of his sex sessions. This is a slight exaggeration of the truth, which is that for a man who has allowed himself one mistress, it is not difficult to have so many of them that his body can withstand.



Does a man leave the family for his mistress: how often, in what cases?

In the vast majority of cases, a man does not leave the family for his mistress. Because he perfectly understands that he is already in a great position. Often the initiator of the gap is the wife, who found out about her husband's infidelity. In this case, a man can go to his mistress involuntarily. He can also leave the family if his marriage is bursting at the seams due to mutual misunderstanding between him and his wife.



If a mistress offers him attentive care and understanding instead of scandals in his family, he can buy into such tricks and leave his wife. In the event that a man marries his new passion and she receives the status of “wife” instead of the status of “lover”, he risks repeating the failures of his first marriage, but in a tougher version, and his new wife risks getting the role of a wife expecting her husband after the campaign to a new more interesting woman.



Which mistresses do men go to?

In order to win in a love triangle, the mistress must be many times better than the wife. Often a woman tries so hard to get closer to the ideal of a man and win that she really becomes a beauty, a smart girl and a goddess of sex. The only thing a man should remember when leaving for such a woman is that she is working on such an image to the limit of her abilities and will stop straining immediately after she becomes a wife.



When do married men leave their mistresses?

Mistresses are not abandoned if they perform the functions assigned to them. But in the event that a woman who is in the role of a lover begins to sort out the functions of a wife, that is, she scandalizes, sorts out relationships, refuses to have sex, then she receives the status of a former lover, and the man finds a more interesting option for himself.



Does a man go through a breakup, do men forget their former lovers?

If the separation between two people happened by mutual agreement, then it can be painless for both the man and the woman. If such people remember the time spent together, then with a slight sadness and gratitude. If the gap was painful and at the initiative of one of the parties, then the man or woman who has lost intimacy will suffer and be tormented by experiences. If the woman who left was bright, non-standard and a Personality with a capital letter, then it will be impossible for a man to forget such a woman.



How to part with a mistress to a married man?

If a man wants to leave a woman beautifully, and without causing her too much moral harm, he must think about how the vacuum or emptiness that will form after his departure will be filled. The most banal, primitive, but working way to “leave unnoticed” is to introduce such a woman to a man who may be interested in a sexually horny lady. If the vacuum is not filled, then the one who left his mistress to the mercy of fate is guaranteed to receive phone calls from a former mistress with requests to meet or “random meetings” on the street.



The best way to get away from a mistress is to captivate her with a new man

Love triangles or polygons have existed in the distant past, are in the present and will be in the future as long as humanity exists. And one can only analyze and state such facts without trying to give wonderful recipes for solving this problem.

Often the psychology of the relationship of married lovers is due to the lack of continuation. The desire to get close to people burdened by the bonds of marriage is explained by the reluctance to leave one's own family. After all, the appearance of a free partner imposes responsibility for the further development of communication.

The general reasons for the appearance of third-party sexual intrigues with not free people are revealed by three main aspects: sex, romance, communication.

Previously enchanting sex is gradually becoming monotonous. Physical intimacy becomes boring, the mysterious act of love becomes a common marital duty.

Wise wives try to bring novelty, invent various ways to diversify the intimate sphere. However, often attempts to awaken the former passion end unsuccessfully. The emotional level remains the same. Having lost interest, the spouses start third-party affairs.

Another sexual partner gives vivid sexual sensations, brings a previously unknown experience. Third-party connections are attracted by the opportunity to experience the variety of sex. Physical contact helps to experience positive emotions, the joy of discovery. There is a feeling of uncertainty, there is a desire to experiment.

Lack of romance

Initially, relationships are always pleasing with romance. Lovers worry, try to seem better. The fan diligently looks after: gives flowers, gifts, various pleasant little things, dinners - he tries in every possible way to please the lady of the heart. The chosen one also maintains a loving atmosphere: arranges romantic evenings, always looks perfect, prepares surprises.

The period of cohabitation is coming. Relationships gradually become boring. The wife begins to attach more importance to the household, less to appearance. The husband ceases to give pleasure to his beloved with petty romantic amenities. A young couple is covered by a daily routine.

Romance is a necessary part of married life.

The cessation of romantic courtship creates the impression of the extinction of past tender feelings. Thoughts are clouded. A desire is born to fall in love again, because strangers seem much more romantic.

The appearance of a new object of admiration causes excitement. There is a desire to impress, delight, surprise. Emotions flare up again. A person needs to maintain the feeling of "butterflies".

Lack of communication

Simple human communication is also necessary for people who have been married for a long time. At first, lovers communicate a lot. Trying to please the interlocutor, they try to impress each other: they support uninteresting topics in every possible way, nod, depicting understanding, and tell various interesting stories.

Starting to live together, the spouses gradually reduce communication to a discussion of exclusively domestic issues. Less importance is attached to the inner feelings of the partner. The time for endless heartfelt conversations is over. However, the need to share impressions, express feelings, discuss significant personal topics remained.

Colleagues are often the newly chosen interlocutors. The employee can make up for the lack of communication. A sweet heart-to-heart conversation can turn into an office romance. Interest in the inner world gives rise to sexual attraction. It seems that a colleague understands perfectly, shares feelings, can console.

Why does a married man need a married lover

Acquiring a married passion, the husband is not guided by the intention to change his wife. The unfaithful chosen one understands that a woman burdened with marriage ties least of all needs a scandal. Usually the unfaithful spouse also fears the destruction of the marriage. The relationships of not free people often do not involve the creation of a new family.

Married mistresses are allowed to be given relatively less care. Free darlings begin to make demands. Having the opportunity to see a fan more often, an unmarried passion extorts constant attention. Therefore, a ringed lover is much more “convenient”. It is not necessary to care, talk, give warmth. The responsibility to make the wife happy belongs to the lawful husband. The main task of a fan is to give sexual satisfaction.

Self-affirmation is another important reason.

Representatives of the stronger sex are looking for any reason to compete. Men are flattered by the possibility of getting the woman they desire. Giving pleasure to someone else's wife gives a feeling of superiority over the lawful husband. This is a way of self-affirmation - to feel your own significance.

Sometimes the husband gets tired of playing the role of the head of the cell of society. Fulfilling the obligations of the breadwinner of the family is sometimes tiring. A tired spouse wants ordinary support. A young mistress is more often an expensive toy than an understanding friend. Therefore, cheaters prefer experienced wise women who are able to realize a lot. Often sensible persons who have received some life experience are married. The main criterion is the personal qualities of the newly elected passion, and not the status of marital status.

Someone else's wife will rarely try on a temporary man for the role of the next husband. Thus, the cheating spouse is insured. A married passion usually wants to save their own marriage. The risk of destroying several families at the same time frightens both. Therefore, a married mistress of a married man can cause a minimum of unpleasant consequences.

There is no need to give expensive gifts. First, it is proper for a lawful husband to pamper his wife. Secondly, it is difficult to explain to the spouse the origin of the things that have appeared. Soon after a short admiration for an expensive present, an autopsy of deception will follow.

Relationships between married lovers involve secrecy. Those who want to save families need to be extremely careful. Fearing exposure, married lovers and mistresses guarantee mutual maximum confidentiality. The same dangerous position ensures mutual coordination of actions.

Why does a married woman need a married lover

The psychology of interpersonal relationships partially explains the behavior of a married mistress. This kind of intimate relationship helps to avoid misunderstandings.

Usually cheaters pursue the same goal - a short-term romance that is incapable of destroying the marriage.

Refusal to develop an extramarital relationship discourages the desire to have a free guy who wants to continue.

The presence of a non-free gentleman saves time. There is no need to explain the impossibility of meeting too often. A free chosen one may want to spend more time together. Therefore, you can easily let him go home immediately after physical intimacy.

The absence of family obligations also favors the appearance of a busy gentleman. A married passion has enough family responsibilities at home. Feeding, cleaning, washing, ironing will be the legal wife. Lovers can only enjoy. Romance is not overshadowed by everyday issues. A secret relationship is constantly accompanied by exceptionally pleasant moments.

Many women consider married men to be experienced lovers. Having not received sexual satisfaction in marriage, desperate wives hope to experience pleasure in the arms of a ringed seducer. There is no need to teach a knowledgeable sexual partner. In addition, he also wants to get new sensations. He is also tired of the monotonous marital sex, so the chosen one tries to give the new passion maximum pleasure.

Some representatives of the weaker sex also enjoy the seduction of other people's companions. The nature of the predator causes an irresistible desire to take possession of busy husbands. A kind of game gives the temptress pleasure. She feels a surge of energy, self-esteem rises. A third-party relationship with someone's spouse exalts the seductress in their own eyes.

Many different reasons to have an unfree sexual partner are complemented by a minimal risk of contracting sexually transmitted infections. A family man, albeit an unfaithful one, usually observes cleanliness. Various diseases are conducive to the exposure of adultery, so changeable husbands monitor sexual health.

Prospects for the development of the novel

Having fallen in love, a married lover and a married woman, whose psychology of behavior did not imply the development of relationships, run the risk of falling in love seriously. A minor affair is sometimes fraught with the destruction of two families. And not always the decision to disperse is justified. Sometimes it seems to lovers that by leaving previous spouses, they will be able to find true happiness. However, in reality, good sexual partners often turn out to be absolutely incompatible in everyday life.

In addition, divorce is preceded by a painful solution to the dilemma: marriage or "fabulous" love. However, the long-awaited passion quickly disappoints. A previously romantic chosen one, who seems to be the hero of a love story, is quite ordinary, no better than a former spouse. The same goes for the ideas of men about a mistress.

It seems that the secret romance is able to last indefinitely. However, according to statistics, such a relationship lasts about 3 years. Then comes the understanding of the true value of the family. Having gained useful experience, having made a mistake, the traitors begin to value legitimate partners more. Having understood the mistakes, the stumbled spouses try to strengthen the marriage union.

Conclusion

The psychology of the relationship of lovers who are legally married can explain the changeable behavior of spouses. However, it is worth thinking three times before starting a third-party relationship. The outcome of such intrigues is fraught with the destruction of not one family, but two at once. In addition, children suffer. Therefore, it is desirable to analyze the possible consequences well. It is probably worth re-evaluating the importance of family ties by trying to renew old feelings.

Love is the territory of only two, so there are no women in the world who seek a serious relationship with married men.

In theory, everything is simple - a married man cannot be "the man of your dreams." He is simply not seen as a potential partner.

But real human relationships are far from ideal. We do not always find out in time that a man is married (you can verify this by visiting almost any women's forum).

The absence of a wedding ring has a calming effect, and when meeting an absent wife, they rarely talk about it - after all, we get to know each other first of all as individuals, and not as possible spouses. And we sincerely rejoice if interest and friendly relations pass into a romantic stage.

But it often turns out that your prince is already married. And the woman begins to wonder what to do and how to stop loving a married man.

Why are relationships with a married man usually futile?

If you, having learned about the presence of a wife, do not lose interest in him and decide to continue the relationship with this man (many do this, because love is blind, strong emotions prevent you from thinking rationally, and the question “why and why am I doing this?” Does not arise) , a love triangle is inevitably formed in which you are assigned the role of a mistress.

In some cases, the triangle quickly breaks up, and the mistress acquires the status of a legal wife. But such cases are the exception rather than the rule.

What do dream books say about this?

Subconsciously, most women know this - it is not for nothing that the dream book, in which folk experience is concentrated, predicts that a married man dreams of trouble. This is not surprising - women usually negatively perceive men who have mistresses.

The dream interpretation also portends the appearance of guilt and tension. If a woman is interested in the meaning of dreams and believes in omens, she can part with a married man in time. And if she is married, she will be able to pay attention to her marriage in time - the dream book interprets such a dream as dissatisfaction with marriage.

Although many modern women consider dream books to be an archaic relic, psychology and statistics in this case agree with them - Sigmund Freud used dreams to conduct psychoanalysis, and even compiled his own dream book.

Statistics say that the resulting love triangles:

  • Often become "chronic" because all its participants are not able to leave.
  • All its participants are psychologically traumatized, and the longer such relationships last, the more severe the trauma.

A woman, having decided to have a relationship with a married man, usually does not take into account the psychological background of his behavior. Psychologists say that in most cases, men with certain problems (complexes, etc.) have mistresses.

Despite the popular opinion about male polygamy, male psychology does not allow, with a stable, warm and sensual relationship with his wife, to have an affair on the side. Why, then, even men who are tuned in to married life sometimes have mistresses?

Why do men need a mistress?

A lover in the life of a normal married man appears when problems arise in his family relationships. Husbands are not inclined to analyze the causes of these problems and eliminate them (the exception is a lover who appeared with his wife).

In most cases, with family troubles, a married man either goes to work or seeks understanding on the side. And then you appear on his horizon - not married, you yourself show interest in him, do not condemn, do not ask “why?” and understand everything as it should!

And the mutual understanding that has arisen between you (if there is none in his family) is the reason why a love affair arises, which a man may later regret. Very often in such cases, your lover begins to rush between you and his wife, to whom he is still attached.

He starts to feel guilty. You can look for answers in dream books, guess, hope that he will go to you forever, you can endlessly. And in the end, most likely, he will not be able to choose: with whom to maintain relations, and with whom not.

A woman who has entered into a relationship with a married man always expects to remain in his life forever, not as a mistress, but as a lawful wife. But many men are quite satisfied with the status of a lover.

A married man needs another woman if:

  1. The wife often makes scandals, all the time she demands something, and he wants an easy relationship without special responsibilities.
  2. Intimate life has become monotonous, but because of this, you don’t want to share property and children.
  3. He got married too early or “over the top”, there are no special feelings for his wife at the moment, other women are of interest, but he is very attached to the child.

The spouse usually does not plan to leave the family, since the domestic side of the marriage suits him perfectly. Often the interest of such men is a bright and married woman, because she rarely wants to part with her husband.

What promises a love triangle to a mistress?

Psychology and statistics say that at first, relationships that are not burdened by everyday life and adorned with romance (a married man tries not only to please you, but also to compensate for the presence of a wife) suit most women who have fallen in love with a married man.

The woman still believes that the lover is really going to part with his wife and draws in her imagination bright pictures of a joint future.

Over time, she realizes that if she becomes the only one, then not soon, she begins to look for a forum with similar stories, look into a dream book or try to clarify the future by other methods. The dream interpretation focuses on the external data of the dreaming man, the forum recommends breaking up, and various predictions are vague.

At the same time, she still likes the man and has no strength to part with him. The woman herself does not understand why she and her chosen one need this relationship, but “I love him” outweighs all arguments, and the dream book, which allows different interpretations, gives false hope.

Over time, interest gradually fades away and the relationship becomes painful. The question of what to do with these relationships, how to fall out of love with a married man and how to part with him, becomes especially acute at the later stage of the existence of the triangle.

The woman worries why she herself allowed this and why she did not stop in time. In some cases, self-esteem falls, and the woman herself does not want to do anything to part with her lover.

Other men do not arouse interest, because in addition to a kind of dependence, a belief is formed that almost all men at least occasionally have mistresses. That is why, having fallen in love with a married man, it is better to immediately think about what to do in order to avoid the fate of a mistress.

If a married man is of interest to you

Although the concept of "mistress" comes from the word "love", society treats women with such a status extremely unfavorably, but "lover" is perceived more adequately. As a result, you are forced to:

  • Endure the pangs of jealousy and at the same time carefully hide them- being married, you can break the dishes as a last resort, but he already has these joys of life “there”. And he is looking for peace, sympathy and complete understanding from you.
  • Never call and never count on him. If necessary, you can write sms, choosing neutral expressions, but no “I love”.
  • Live in constant anticipation of his visit, i.e. regularly be on full alert and keep his interest.
  • Spend the holidays alone. Even if your lover celebrates some event surrounded by colleagues, it is inconvenient for him to take you instead of his wife.
  • Tolerate his lies.
  • Deal with the fact that he has a child, therefore, in addition to remorse, you are still waiting for “I can’t today - my son has training, temperature, parent meeting, etc.”.

At the same time, you also want to have children, but a child from a married man either remains completely without a dad, or his dad is coming, “Sunday”. Even if a woman thinks that she can tie a lover to her as a child, and he leaves the family, at best she will simply turn into a secret wife.

The forum on this issue is replete with sad stories about believing in what "loves" and about unfulfilled hopes, but even sadder when a child is involved in this difficult relationship. Therefore, if you decide to create a full-fledged family, with your beloved, but married, it is better to leave, and it is better if you do it yourself.

How to end a hopeless relationship with a married man?

Psychology claims that a person is not able to control love, but we are quite capable of preventing love from developing into a deep feeling. If you realize that you like a married man, try to study all the nuances of the situation.

The man who arouses your interest may well not live with his family (marriage exists only on paper). It is desirable to obtain information not from the man himself, but from disinterested persons (mutual friends, etc.).

If the marriage is formal, you can give free rein to your feelings, and not even look into the dream book.

If there were no signs of “disintegration” in the family before your appearance, and you do not want endless meetings with a lover who will never become a husband, you need to understand how to stop loving a married man and what you need to do for this.

Desirable:

  • Take a timeout in communication. During this time, you can meet a person who will be of interest to you and at the same time will not be married.
  • Imagine that you are married to him and what will you do in this case. In the process of courtship, a person shows himself from the best side, but it is no coincidence that his family life is not ideal, because not only the wife is to blame for this situation (often the lover believes that only the wives themselves are to blame for the fact that men have mistresses).
  • If your relationship has been going on for some time, you are most likely sure that he loves you, but is still living with her (there is always an explanation for “why”). Your "I love" does not allow a sober look at the situation, but it is simply necessary.

If a divorce does not occur in the first months of a new romance, according to statistics, it will never happen. In this case, it is the man who must decide who is more dear to him - his wife or his mistress.

If he really loves you, he will definitely decide on a divorce. But for some reason he can't make up his mind. So why waste your feelings and life on someone who did not deserve it?

Why me?

In addition, in order to understand how to forget a married man, it is important to analyze your past. Not every woman loves a married man and agrees to the role of a mistress.

Psychology says that married men come across quite often to women with low self-esteem. Therefore, first of all, you need to increase your self-esteem, throw away the dream book and fortune-telling cards, pay attention to yourself and surround yourself with new positive impressions.

Try to look at the forum on this topic - communicating with people in a similar situation will help you make the right decision and avoid men who have mistresses in the future.

Think about whether you can trust this man if he becomes your husband. After all, once he had already decided to have a mistress, and for some men, the presence of mistresses is the norm.

Do not live in illusions - the sooner you can correctly assess the situation, the more chances you have to become happy. Without false hopes, interpretations of dream books, advice from friends and fortune tellers.

The status of a married man's mistress obliges a lot, but does not give so generously in return. The problem of relationships in such an alliance deserves detailed and comprehensive consideration.

The word "lover" originates from the word "love", but this kind of relationship implies, in addition to a high feeling, a bouquet of additional sensations, and not always positive ones.

Secret passion is implicated in deceit, betrayal, worries and mistrust. Therefore, a woman who plays the role of an additional corner in a love triangle has to go through a lot and feel it.

But why do such relationships arise, how do they develop and what outcome can they have? Let's try to answer these questions.

Why family go "to the left"

Indeed, what pushes a man who has a wife, perhaps children, to betray? Why does a married man need a mistress? What are the reasons for its appearance?

The answers to these questions are very varied:


If everything is basically clear with the motives of the strong half, then it's time to figure out what a woman who decides to take such a step is like.

mistress status

A woman who has seduced someone else's husband, or who herself has succumbed to temptation, receives her share of disturbing happiness. At first, it is she who rules over a man, occupies all his thoughts, attention, free time.

The lover endows her with unspent or borrowed caress from her legal wife. A man presents gifts to his beloved, arranges cute surprises.

During this period, she can proudly declare to her friends: “I am the mistress of a married man! He is ready to carry me in his arms!” - and see their surprised, admiring or envious looks. She feels victory over her rival, her superiority over her.

But gradually the intensity of passions subsides and the negative aspects of such relations come first.

What does it feel

Spending long hours waiting for a meeting, a secret beloved has the opportunity to think and understand a lot. She fully begins to realize what it is like to be the mistress of an unfree person.

What does she feel about it?


Further perspective

It makes sense to endure all of the above experiences only if they are justified.

What prospects open up for the mistress of a married man:


Who will the man choose?

The outcome of a relationship is largely determined by how an unfaithful husband prioritizes. If the main thing for him is the family, the connection with his mistress will be sacrificed. If a new love wins, the prospects for the beloved woman will open up more rosy.

According to statistics, a man chooses a family more often. With her, he is connected by duty, a sense of responsibility and obligation. The opinions of others can be important.

From the point of view of psychology, it is more convenient for a man to stay in a familiar environment, with a person familiar to him. Divorce threatens with radical changes for which he is not mentally prepared.

Do not forget that often stories about a crisis in the family and a break in relations with his wife are nothing more than a beautiful legend that allows a man to lure a woman. In fact, it turns out that they live in perfect marriage and the traitor does not have a choice at all.

Even the collapse of family life is not a guarantee that a man will rush to the registry office again. Most likely, he will value freedom even more, and may even leave his mistress, perceiving her as part of an unsuccessful marriage.

A beloved woman has a chance only if she was able to create optimally comfortable conditions for a man, and a strong feeling, absolute mutual understanding arose between them.

Things are somewhat different between lovers who have families of their own.

Married mistress of a married man

This kind of relationship is not uncommon. And if previously married ladies were usually driven to adultery by their husband's infidelity, now more and more often the determining factor is the desire for new emotions and impressions.

In the phrase "I am a married lover" for many women lies a special charm. Adultery helps them raise their self-esteem, feel in demand, attractive and desirable.

Men, for many reasons, consider someone else's wife an ideal lover.

What attracts her


By agreeing to a secret relationship with someone else's husband, a woman accepts an unspoken contract that regulates what can and cannot be done.

How to behave


Many young ladies are concerned about the question of what a woman should be in order to win someone else's husband?

How to become someone else's favorite

  • A woman who sets out to become a lover should be nice, friendly with the desired man. But he must feel the excitement of the hunter, you can’t throw yourself on his neck.
  • The future mistress of a married man must always look perfect, show him his appearance from the best side.
  • Men love praise, a woman should praise him for his achievements, admire his talents.
  • The hunter for other people's husbands should show genuine interest and sensitivity to the object of desire, show her ability to listen and empathize.

How to break up

To come to a decision on the need to break ties with someone else's husband, you need to look at these relationships from the outside, weigh the prospects, risks, assess your fears and the possible gain from such an outcome.

It is very difficult to stop meeting a person who gave so many pleasant and painful minutes. But sometimes this is the only chance to become free and open to new feelings, let go of the past and create a foundation for a full happy life.


Being the mistress of a married man is hard and thankless work. You have to constantly adapt to other people's circumstances, lurk, worry, accumulate conflicting emotions in yourself.

And the game is not always worth the candle, rarely when such lovers become spouses, relationships either fade away or drag on without change for many years, during which a woman denies herself the happiness of being herself and openly showing her feelings.

Married ladies are more protected in this regard, but they are also at greater risk. No matter how difficult the process of parting may be, sometimes this is the only way out of a painful relationship.

A self-sufficient, self-confident, appreciating her dignity and happy woman is capable of avoiding contact with a married man. Be happy and love yourself!

Video: Instructions: how to live a mistress